Chris Stewart

Just a guy. Versatile in life. Into a little of everything, known to try anything twice. Enjoys karaoke, line dancing, reading, movies, spending time with friends. Smart and intelligent (they are quite different). Virgo, Virgo rising; for the astrology followers. Requires common sense, a sense of humour and comprehension of twisted elegance to be around. Your mileage may vary. Not valid where prohibited by law. Some terms and conditions may apply.

Updates

Wall Photos

Cover Photos

CCCLXV

.:Me

The Museum of Me

Ping.fm Photos

Older MySpace Photos

Why every company should have homos on their staff

Photos

Favorites

History

Queue

Profile

Digital Media Coordinator at CB&S Advertising
Marketing and Advertising | Portland, Oregon Area, US

Summary

With a varied background in Marketing and Advertising, ranging from restaurants to real estate, my experience has allowed me the opportunity to learn about many styles and genres of marketing.
Specialties: Website design, development, marketing, advertising, internet advertising

Experience

  • Jun 2011 - Present
    Digital Media Coordinator / CB&S Advertising
  • Sept 1998 - Present
    Owner / PrinterActive Media, Web Design & Marketing
  • Jun 2010 - Oct 2011
    Interactive Media Trafficker / CB&S Advertising
  • Dec 2008 - Jun 2010
    Customer Service / United Parcel Service / Spherion Staffing
  • Oct 2007 - Mar 2008
    Administrative/Clerical Positions / Adecco Staffing
  • May 2007 - Oct 2007
    Telecommuting Inside Sales Assistant (Long Beach, CA) / Chicago Title Insurance Company
  • Apr 2005 - May 2007
    Director of Marketing / Coldwell Banker
  • Jun 2000 - Sept 2004
    Assistant to Director of Marketing / RMD Corp / Hooters Corporate Office
  • Feb 2000 - Jul 2000
    Enumerator / United States Census Bureau
  • Jun 1998 - Jun 2000
    Cash Office / Systems / Meijer
  • Jun 1998 - Jan 2000
    Promotional Manager / Papa John's

Uploads

Favorites

Posts

December 21, 06:04 PM

Nom nom PZZZSSHT! nom.

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 21, 03:26 PM

I don't know why but I can't stop giggling.

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via Epic Fail Funny Videos and Funny Pictures by Lady Justice on 12/20/10


Submitted by:

Badmoves


 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 21, 03:06 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via I have seen the whole of the internet by greenmeats@gmail.com (Joanne Casey) on 12/18/10


 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 21, 02:43 PM

Zomg.

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via Cute Overload by Meg on 12/18/10

Check out Sender Inner Jessica S.'s kittens—they're totally pent up in the house during a snowstorm driving each other crazy wrestling:

I will get out of this headlock my friend, and when I do, YOU'RE TOAST!


Filed under: Uncategorized

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 20, 07:29 PM

Har har har

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 20, 06:59 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 



January is teh start of sumfin speshul…

O Hai, Cheez Frendz! Fanks fer hangin owt wiff us awl week n revyooin' teh yeer dat waz. We finish dis series wiff a lewk back at UR lolz, teh hart n soul of dis site. We has chosen, based awn faeboritz n votes, 1 lol from each month n sew is kinda a lol-endar of teh yeer. Fanks agin fer maykin us laff all yeer!


February iz awl abowt lubz!


March kums in lyk a lion, n owt lyk a lamb..

Clik fru 2 see teh lolz frum teh rest ob teh yeer!


April Foolz!


Did u celebrayt Cinco de Mayo?


June iz teh start ob summerz, wen we begin habin teh reel funz!


No, teh July heet izn't maykin ya hallusinate…Dere iz an awful lawt of adorabul ebil in dis pikshur!


Dese August kittehz is mebbe scared ob Justin Bieber…or mebbe dey is dreadin goin bak 2 skool!


Oof, wut an exhawstin summer! September iz a gud tym fer nappin!


Iz October, wich meens Happeh Meowloween!


November, or az we lyk 2 cawl it: Nomvember!


December iz a magikul tym ob yeer, full ob holidayz…n moar nomz.



 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 18, 12:15 AM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via TYWKIWDBI by noreply@blogger.com (Minnesotastan) on 12/10/10


Performed by the Class of 2013 at Hope College (Michigan).  About 10 minutes in length; you'll know after the first 1:15 whether to switch to fullscreen or shut it off (I chose the former).

Via Neatorama.

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 17, 06:56 PM

This is kinda amazing (considering it looks like Pixar did it)

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via mental_floss Blog by Ransom Riggs on 12/13/10

It wasn't so many years ago that movies like Toy Story were absolutely cutting-edge, and it was hard to imagine how such slick animation could've been produced by a computer. And while Pixar has always managed to stay way ahead of the curve, the technology it used to produce now-classic movies like Luxo, Jr. (this famous short) is no longer out of reach of talented animators who have a reasonably good home computer setup and access to 3D animation software like Maya. In fact, in the last 24 hours I've seen two independently-produced parodies of computer-animated movies that look jaw-droppingly great — and they're funny, to boot. (Darkly funny.) First, check out College Humor's parody of Luxo, Jr., which takes the consequence's of Luxo's I-squishing to an extreme.

OK, if you thought THAT was dark, this is REALLY dark. What if Yogi Bear ended like The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford? This is kind of genius, really intense, and MOST DEFINITELY NOT FOR KIDS! (But don't worry … it's not quite as graphic as it seems like it's going to be.)


 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 17, 06:17 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 17, 04:58 PM

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 17, 02:57 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 


Apologiez 2 Cheez Peeps who may be a bit confoosed. We had sum teknikul diffikultiez, but nao dis vid is back up n heer fer u 2 enjoy!



 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 17, 02:27 PM
December 21: Total eclipse of the Moon This eclipse will be fully visible from North America. The moon enters penumbra at 12:28 A.M. EST on December 21 and leaves penumbra at 6:06 A.M. EST on December 21.

Times of over North America
Event PST
(-8 UTC)
MST
(-7 UTC)
CST
(-6 UTC)
EST
(-5 UTC)
Start penumbral (P1) 9:27 pm (*) 10:27 pm (*) 11:27 pm (*) 12:27 am
Start umbral (U1) 10:32 pm (*) 11:32 pm (*) 12:32 am 1:32 am
Start total (U2) 11:40 pm (*) 12:40 am 1:40 am 2:40 am
Greatest eclipse 12:17 am 1:17 am 2:17 am 3:17 am
End total (U3) 12:53 am 1:53 am 2:53 am 3:53 am
End umbra (U4) 2:02 am 3:02 am 4:02 am 5:02 am
End penumbral (P4) 3:06 am 4:06 am 5:06 am 6:06 am
(*) before midnight on Monday night, December 20

More information here:

--
Christopher Stewart

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 11, 08:09 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 10, 01:37 PM

$1 for Three DVD Rentals from Redbox ($3 Value) http://www.groupon.com/deals/redbox-national?utm_campaign=UserReferral&utm_medium=email&utm_source=uu13892746


I did!  Yay RedBox! Yay Groupon!  Yay Exclamation Points!!!

:D

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 09, 03:31 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via I have seen the whole of the internet by greenmeats@gmail.com (Joanne Casey) on 12/6/10


 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 06, 10:51 AM
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: "Chris Stewart" <virgored@gmail.com>
Date: Mar 11, 2008 2:38 PM
Subject: Cut off the end?
To:

Brisket Recipe

A young Jewish mother is preparing a Brisket one Friday for Shabbat dinner.  Her daughter watches with interest as the mother slices off the ends of the Brisket before placing it in the roasting pan. 

 

The young girl asks her mother why she did this.  The mother pauses for a moment and then says, "You know, I am not sure.....this is the way I always saw my mother make a brisket.  Let's call Grandma and ask her. "

 

So, she phones the grandmother and asks why they always slice the ends off the brisket before roasting.   "The Grandmother thinks for a moment and then says.  "You know, I am not sure why, this is the way I always saw MY mother make a brisket." 

 

Now the two women are very curious, so they pay a visit to the great-grandmother in the nursing home.  "You know when we make a brisket,"

they explain, "we always slice off the ends before roasting.  Why is that?" 

"I don't know why you do it" says the old woman, "but I never had a pan that was large enough!"



--
~Chris Stewart~
virgored@gmail.com
Here's what I'm reading: http://www.virgored.com/read.htm

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 04, 07:14 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via about:blank by Jase on 12/3/10

I used to love Road Runner when i was a kid. I was delighted when i came across this video doing the rounds at the moment. Its been updated but lovely gorgeous 3D graphics…

Its actually been put up for nomination for an oscar up against Pixar. Take a look at the animation short list from the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.



 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 04, 06:08 PM

Whoa.

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via haha.nu by hahanu on 12/3/10

Chinese drivers drive their new cars like what they used to ride: bikes. The result is disaster. Adding the safetiness of their own cars

@ haha.nu

Related posts:

  1. Horrific traffic accident in Taiwan
  2. Learn Chinese 2
  3. Renault Ballet
  4. The Chinese Lovestory
  5. Chinese Cars Crash Tests


 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 04, 05:34 PM

AWW

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via Cute Overload by Not That Mike The Other Mike on 12/3/10

CATNIP FALLS, CT — Surgeons at Mercy Me Medical Center separated two kitties who were joined at the head.

Because the kitties shared a single brain, an agreement has been reached…

…for each kitty to use the brain on alternate days.

Kate N. says: "Here are our kittehs Max and Gracie, stuffed after Thanksgiving turkey. Max (left) was nice enough to welcome Gracie into the family after she and her sisters were born in a shed near our yard. Now they are best friends!"


Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: Kittens

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 03, 11:14 AM


--
Christopher Stewart

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
December 02, 09:57 PM

This is AWESOME.

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via MAKE Magazine by Sean Michael Ragan on 12/1/10

...but the technical term is End-Struck Plosive Aerophones. If you've ever seen Blue Man Group, for instance, you're already familiar with the DIY PVC pipe percussion instrument played by YouTuber snubbyj in this video. I built a one-octave set of these, once, and it took about an afternoon, and about $20 worth of stuff from the hardware store. They have a great sound—somewhere between a marimba and a guitar—and are dirt simple: Cut PVC pipe to various lengths, arrange as a piano keyboard, and slap the open ends of the pipes with foam paddles to play. [via Neatorama]

More:

Read the Full Story » | More on MAKE » | Comments » | Read more articles in Music | Digg this!

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
November 28, 11:39 PM

Hi-larious.

 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via Nick Holmes... on 11/28/10

Skaters gonna skate.  Haters gonna hate.


 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
November 26, 05:17 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

via Nick Holmes... on 11/25/10

I can't stop looking at this.


 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
November 25, 04:47 PM
http://www.mymodernmet.com/profiles/blogs/unbelievable-3d-drawings-16



--
Christopher Stewart

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com
November 25, 04:30 PM
 
 

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

 
 

 
 

Things you can do from here:

 
 

--
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google
Groups "Teh Interwebs" group.
To unsubscribe from this group, send email to teh-interwebs-unsubscribe@googlegroups.com

Posts

January 29, 02:34 PM
January 29, 02:22 PM

Tags:

January 26, 07:08 PM

Annotations:

Posts

The future of urinals.

Truly Unsettling “Dancing” Squid for Dinner [Video]

Whoa. Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader: Truly Unsettling “Dancing” Squid for Dinner [Video] via Geekosystem by Max Eddy on 7/24/11 While there are any number of foods involving cephalopods in one form another, this particular Japanese squid dish is not what it seems. When you pour soy sauce over the squid, its legs begin to move and “dance” around. Apparently, the soy sauce is what makes the food get up and dance. There’s some disagreement on Reddit about what exactly is going on, but all agree that the high salt of the soy sauce is key. Here’s a sample of the discussion, from user stumblejack: This is due to the salt in the soy sauce. The same thing would happen if you poured salt grains on the squid. It doesn’t “activate the neurons.” Sodium potassium pumps create an action potential. Edit: To clarify, sodium potassium pumps maintain the ion gradient across the membrane in a living organism. In this case, however, the ion gradient does not need to be maintained. The gradient is created upon addition of the soy sauce which adds sodium ions on the outside of the membrane. Naturally, these want to diffuse across the membrane to try to reach a state of equilibrium between the inner and outer sections of the membrane. So, this has less to do with the pumps than it does with a concentration driven gradient of sodium ions from the outside to the inside. Whatever is going on here, it certainly is weird as all get out. (via Reddit) Things you can do from here: - Subscribe to Geekosystem using Google Reader - Get started using Google Reader to easily keep up with all your favorite sites

yourmonkeycalled:

Amy Winehouse : “Love Is a Losing Game (Demo Version)”

This man has a man for a penis. Your argument is invalid.

Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader: This man has a man for a penis. Your argument is invalid. via Nick Holmes… on 7/20/11 This man has a man for a penis. Your argument is invalid. Things you can do from here: - Subscribe to Nick Holmes… using Google Reader - Get started using Google Reader to easily keep up with all your favorite sites

10 Charts Of Awkward Situations: Every one of these is so true! ..

Glowing sternum. I haz it.

You betta stop, bro… or I’ll cut ya dick off.

Audio

  • yourmonkeycalled: Amy Winehouse : “Love Is a Losing Game (Demo Version)”
    360 plays

Latest checkin

Badges

Checkin history

Friends

Posts

January 26, 07:08 PM

Annotations:
January 16, 11:26 AM

Annotations:
  • Kroger Co. officer Mary Elizabeth van Oflen sold 4,500 shares on Dec. 19 for $107,730.
January 13, 11:48 AM

December 23, 04:18 PM

Annotations:
November 14, 03:51 PM

Annotations:
  • A succession of people from the same family who play a prominent role in a certain field.
November 06, 11:33 PM

javascript:var x=document.getElementsByTagName("input");for(var i=0;i

October 26, 04:13 PM

Crockpot BBQ Beer Chicken serves about 8-10 3 pounds boneless, skinless chicken breasts (about 6 large) 1 tablespoon onion powder 1

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz