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Christopher Stewart

Just a guy. Versatile in life. Into a little of everything, known to try anything twice. Enjoys karaoke, line dancing, reading, movies, spending time with friends. Smart and intelligent (they are quite different). Virgo, Leo rising; for the astrology followers. Requires common sense, a sense of humour and comprehension of twisted elegance to be around. Your mileage may vary. Not valid where prohibited by law. Some terms and conditions may apply.

Profile

Christopher Stewart

Small Business & Marketing Consulting
Marketing and Advertising | Portland, Oregon Area, US

Summary

With a varied background in Marketing and Advertising, ranging from restaurants to real estate, my experience has allowed me the opportunity to learn about many styles and genres of marketing.
Specialties: Website design, development, marketing, advertising, internet advertising

Experience

  • Dec 2008 - Present

    Customer Service / United Parcel Service / Spherion Staffing

    Providing service picking up held packages, shipping and packing shipments and troubleshooting lost shipments; active problem-solving for shipment exceptions; providing vacation coverage for both shifts when needed; compiling and distributing data intensive reports on driver activity
  • Sept 1998 - Present

    Owner / PrinterActive Media, Web Design & Marketing

    Graphic Design, Social Network Marketing, Email Marketing, Print Advertising and Website Design/Development and more specifically for small businesses, micro-businesses (businesses of 1 person), and non-profits
  • Jan 2008 - Mar 2008

    Regulatory Legal Assistant / Portland General Electric

    Assisting two Assistant General Counsels with all aspects of their practice, including but not limited to calendaring, filing and regulatory paperwork, utility commission updates and more; additionally acting as overflow assistant for additional projects
  • Oct 2007 - Jan 2008

    Federal Energy Regulatory Commission Compliance / Portland General Electric

    Reviewing correspondence to ensure compliance with federal regulations, redacting and producing documents as required by FERC; assisting two attorneys and four specialists
  • Apr 2005 - May 2007

    Director of Marketing / Coldwell Banker

    Ensured conceptual integrity by reviewing agent advertising for adherence to identity standards, supervised property listing additions to the Southern California Multiple Listing Service, worked with over 200 agents to help them reach their marketing/advertising goals, coordinated company website maintenance, generated billing for agents, created marketing materials for agents upon request, as well as ordered promotional materials
  • Jun 2000 - Sept 2004

    Assistant to Director of Marketing / RMD Corp / Hooters Corporate Office

    Cultivation of relationships with outside vendors, envisioned company website, researched hosting solutions to determine most cost efficient solution, developed & created all code, graphic material & site layout for corporate public site & maintained site & domain registration status, coordination & deployment of company mystery shopper program and facilitation of monthly ‘secret shops’ for all 39 operations; including dissemination of reports, reinvented former uniform order procedure & implemented streamlined digital ordering process, aggregation of orders and submission to merchanding company, facilitation of telephony for entire corporate structure, including corporate office & operations’ land lines (local, long-distance & toll-free numbers), cellular technology & paging, ordering, distribution & tracking of incentives, including pre-paid gift cards and other assorted incentives, streamlined manager relocation process & facilitated relocation rental truck process, performed all administrative marketing responsibilities to assist Director of Marketing
  • Jun 1998 - Jun 2002

    Cash Office / Systems / Meijer

    Cash Office: Balancing of safe, counting and distribution of employee cash til and sales figures, deposits of checks Systems: Scanning of store products, auditing pricing integrity for each department, help desk and troubleshooting of all technology
  • Feb 2000 - Jul 2000

    Enumerator / United States Census Bureau

  • Jun 1998 - Jan 2000

    Promotional Manager / Papa John's

Education

  • Self-employment

Additional information

Websites:
My Company, Personal Website
Honors:
2001 ∙ presented Special Recognition Award for Outstanding Teamwork & Creativity from RMD 2002 ∙ presented Outstanding Performance Award from RMD 2003 ∙ presented Outstanding Dedication Award from RMD
Interests:
Website design, graphic design, marketing, technology, social events, movies, reading, karaoke
Assoc.:
board member of Music Art Resource Collective of Portland (Non-profit)
LinkedIn

Posts

  • March 17, 11:00 PM

    Chatroulette Piano Man

    This is kind of *amazing*.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via mental_floss Blog by Chris Higgins on 3/16/10

    Today's most important web video: a guy named Merton performing improvised Ben Folds-style piano songs during Chatroulette sessions. It's hilarious and wonderful and makes me feel like everything's gonna be oookay. If you watch one web video today, please let it be this one.

    All right, let me back up and explain what's going on here: Chatroulette is a very NSFW chat service in which you randomly connect with strangers for video chats. All the kids are doing it these days, and there's a lot of amateur naughty business going on. BUT — this dude Merton is single-handedly making Chatroulette an awesome place to be, by connecting with strangers via improvised piano/vocal compositions. Seriously. He connects and immediately begins playing a song based on what he sees. In the first connection Merton improvises: "Reclining dude in a white tank-tap / leaning his head on his hand / semi-Italian-looking / just like his parents planned." In another case he demands: "Request a song." The random chatted-up girl requests "Fireflies" and Merton immediately plays it. In other cases, he carries on extended piano-improv-song "conversations" with the chattees as their astonishment with him grows.

    The video contains a few swears, but listen, guys, while we're alone here — this video makes me very happy. I hope Merton gets a TV deal out of this somehow.

    <embed allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="never" height="340" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/32vpgNiAH60&amp;hl=en_US&amp;fs=1&amp;rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="560"></embed>


     
     

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  • March 17, 03:42 PM

    Time to pet your screen!

    Aww

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via Cute Overload by Meg on 3/16/10

    Take a moment from writing TPS reports to check out this kitten morsel—so soft and delectabuhls! You may now pet your screen. GENTLEH!

    Hitomi Y. took time out from making luxury pet beds to send this in.


    Filed under: Uncategorized Tagged: I'm Going to Eat You, Kittens



     
     

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  • March 15, 04:45 AM

    Re: For Cat Lovers

    So cutes.

    fdd59b9956
    fdd59b9956




    On Sun, Mar 14, 2010 at 12:08 PM, Rich Julian <rich@richjulian.com> wrote:
          CATS ON INVISIBLE THINGS !


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  • March 12, 01:01 AM

    OMG So Awesome.

    Why didn't I think of this?  And why don't I have any pregnant friends?!?

    Today, I convinced my pregnant sister that a baby shower is simply lame, and that she should have a fetus fiesta instead. We are now searching for deals on sombreros and baby-themed pinatas.
    from MyLifeIsAverage.com Read more

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  • March 12, 12:54 AM

    omg so funneh

    A little mean to the kitteh, but mostly funnehs!

    http://www.instructables.com/image/FHLLMQSG6MIE83X/Plastic-Wrap-Door-Trick.jpg

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  • March 11, 08:58 PM

    MIIIINE!

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

     
     

    Things you can do from here:

     
     

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  • March 11, 07:45 PM

    What burger chain reigns supreme?

    Mmm... Sonic.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via FlowingData by Nathan on 3/10/10

    What burger chain reigns supreme?

    In a follow up to his McDonald's map, Stephen Von Worley of Weather Sealed maps the dominating burger chains across the United States. McDonald's obviously has a stronghold in a lot of areas but not all of them. Most noticeable is Sonic Drive-in with over 900 restaurants in Texas alone. Personally, I'm rooting for Carl's Jr. and In-n-Out.

    [via We Love Datavis]


     
     

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  • March 11, 07:45 PM

    What burger chain reigns supreme?

    Mmm... Sonic.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via FlowingData by Nathan on 3/10/10

    What burger chain reigns supreme?

    In a follow up to his McDonald's map, Stephen Von Worley of Weather Sealed maps the dominating burger chains across the United States. McDonald's obviously has a stronghold in a lot of areas but not all of them. Most noticeable is Sonic Drive-in with over 900 restaurants in Texas alone. Personally, I'm rooting for Carl's Jr. and In-n-Out.

    [via We Love Datavis]


     
     

    Things you can do from here:

     
     

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  • March 10, 07:12 PM

    Coolest pool table EVER

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via haha.nu by hahanu on 3/9/10

    This creation by Obscura Digital is probably the coolest pool table you have ever seen. Featured at the Esquire Houses Ultimate Bachelor Pad in NYC.

    <embed allowscriptaccess="never" height="400" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HLu70Zcejxk&amp;rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="500"></embed>

    @ haha.nu

    Related posts:

    1. Self-balancing pool table
    2. Deep Green, the pool-playing robot
    3. Table and chair set spells out TABLE
    4. Obscura VisionAire
    5. On a pool-shots mood – greatest pool shot ever


     
     

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  • March 09, 06:20 PM

    Twue.

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  • March 09, 02:16 PM

    Cow & Boy - March 8, 2010

    So true.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

     
     

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  • March 07, 01:30 PM

    Toyota

    Now that Toyota has their safety concerns fixed, here's their new simulator to share what the Toyota experience is truly like.

    http://www.ToyotaSimulator.com


    fdd59b9956
    fdd59b9956



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  • March 06, 11:47 PM

    Just so ya know.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via Nick Holmes... on 3/6/10



    ATTN:


     
     

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  • March 06, 08:22 PM

    And I can

    I totally snortlaughed.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     



    funny pictures of cats with captions

    And I can poop dem too.

    mai mom sez so

    Picture by: Maureen HM B Caption by: djlucas via Advanced Lol Builder

    » Recaption This!

    » View All Captions





     
     

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  • March 06, 05:11 PM

    Great press!

    The press good keeps coming! 

    http://blogout.justout.com/?p=15099

    Formidable?  Just last year I was described as 'indomitable'.... neat-o!

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  • March 06, 05:05 PM

    Equal Opportunity Fail or Job Win?

    Then Portland emo kids are so no qualified. AND NO SKINNY JEANS EITHER!

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     



    epic fail pictures

    Equal Opportunity Fail

    Aww .. but he just wants love.

    Picture by: dunno source Submitted by: dunno source via Fail Uploader





     
     

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  • March 04, 03:04 AM

    See me on LIVE Television

    http://bit.ly/anQ3LS

    Okay, it's actually me as Zora, but OMG, on LIVE TV!!!

    And I only stuttered once!

    fdd59b9956
    fdd59b9956



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  • March 01, 08:57 PM

    Power line 1, tree branch 0

    Beautifully scary.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via MAKE Magazine by Sean Michael Ragan on 3/1/10

    <embed allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="never" height="486" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/DYktDghfoFM&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;rel=0&amp;showinfo=0&amp;ap=%2526fmt%3D18" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="600"></embed>

    Video courtesy YouTuber BozkurtTekinTahsin.

    In case you didn't believe Louie the Lightening Bug when he said "ya gotta stay away from power lines," consider the fate of this gentle tree branch, who apparently never got to watch Saturday morning PSAs, or at least wasn't paying attention if it did. It screams, literally, for about 14 seconds before bursting into flames like a vampire in a tanning booth.

    [via Neatorama]

    Read more | Permalink | Comments | Read more articles in Electronics | Digg this!

     
     

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  • February 25, 06:02 PM

    Ice Fishing Kitteh

    Gigglez.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     


    <embed allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="never" height="412" name="viddler" src="http://www.viddler.com/player/adadc646" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="500"></embed>





     
     

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  • February 24, 11:49 PM

    What kind of planet are we on?

    Watch it. Just do it.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     

    via I'm just sayin'... by Willo on 2/24/10

    Please think about this when you vote. It does matter.

    <embed allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="never" height="344" src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WoNiZhAUWcg&amp;color1=0xb1b1b1&amp;color2=0xcfcfcf&amp;hl=en_US&amp;feature=player_embedded&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425"></embed>

     
     

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  • February 24, 07:55 PM

    Jumping Kittehs

    So funneh. I want a kitteh sos I can do dis.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     



    <embed allowfullscreen="true" allowscriptaccess="never" height="412" name="viddler" src="http://www.viddler.com/player/612dbc71" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="500"></embed>




     
     

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  • February 24, 07:50 PM

    2010 Olympics "Tourist" Questions

    Note: These are hilariously fake, as explained here: http://www.snopes.com/travel/foreign/olympics.asp
     
    QUESTIONS ABOUT 2010 OLYMPICS

    Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the 2010 Winter Olympics these are some questions people the world over are asking!!!! Believe it or not these questions about Canada were posted on an International Tourism Website (frightening, isn't it!)

    Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
    A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.

    Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
    A: Depends on how much you've been drinking.

    Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden)
    A: Sure, it's only Four thousand miles, take lots of water.

    Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
    A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.

    Q: It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
    A: Let's not touch this one.

    Q: Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
    A: What did your last slave die of?

    Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
    A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North...oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.

    Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
    A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.

    Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
    A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.

    Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
    A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.

    Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
    A: No, WE don't stink.

    Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you sell it in Canada? (USA)
    A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.

    Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
    A: Yes, gay nightclubs.

    Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
    A: Only at Thanksgiving.

    Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
    A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.

    Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
    A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.

    Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
    A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.

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  • February 24, 06:08 PM

    Saying goodnight to Mother

    You don't have to own a cat to appreciate this one! You don't even have to like 'em! 

    We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house. The cat we put out in the back yard, scoots back into the front door.

    We didn't want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird. My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit. 

    Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn't want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon, 'He's just going upstairs to say Goodbye to my mother.' 

    A few minutes later, I get into the cab. 'Sorry I took so long,' I said, as we drove away. 'That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!'

    The cab driver hit a parked car.
     

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  • February 23, 09:44 PM

    see?

    This is *so* true.

     
     

    Sent to you by Chris via Google Reader:

     
     



    Funny Pictures of Cats With Captions

    see? and smart people get kittehs.

    or nawt

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  • February 19, 09:05 PM

    Made me scream-laugh

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