the duty.
the tumblr.- the twitter.
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- the google+
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Posts
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Tweets
- MAN. days like today, I feel like I can do absolutely ANYTHING. well, except bringing this hooker back to life.
- then you take the hair, twist it out like this annnd...VOILA! HE'S GOT A LIL MUSTACHE! ... OKAY. no more masturbating on your dog's face.
- THAT'S a Best Buy gift card, not only does it cover your $20 fee, but there's an extra $5 too, now put it back in your g-string & WIGGLE IT.
- OH YEAH?! PHONE SEX?! oook, haven't done THIS in a while... ROLE PLAY?!?! OH YOU'RE NAUGHTY! a mime? ok, this is gonna get nasty! ...
- sure he looks happy now, but let's see his face when he gets to the bottom of that donut box & sees the photos of "Capt. Weenis's Ringtoss."
- every time I drive by a Waffle House it reminds me of masturbating while driving by a Waffle HousOHHHHHHHHHH! ahhh... ... OH DAMMIT!
- WELL, ma'am, we're going to have to agree to disagree. the only TRUE way to make sure the kids washed their hands IS to lick their fingers.
- still trying to figure out a wrong way to eat all these Reese's. so far, "lined up on a hobo's dong" is a front runner. still pretty good.Nov 02, 11 from web Reply, Retweet, Favorite
- ...this new iPhone is cool & all but I wish it said "searching for hot black on goat midget porn" in the same sultry way my grandpa says it.
- lost a bet to Uncle Tim that he couldn't lick Ranch Dressing off of his pal Les's dinger and now I have to give them both naked massages. :(
- finally got to 3rd base with my middle school crush, but now I have to find a way to tell her I'm not going with her to the 8th grade prom.
- dulcimer tones of warm streams tap-dancing on a porcelain dancefloor. our eyes meet. "hey, that's a nice lookin' ding-dong." "back at cha."
- OH MAN! if i move a little to the left I can see all the way down this lady's shirt! kudos to whoever decided to make this an open casket!!
- alls I'm saying is, you shouldn't be called "Scrapbookin EVERYTHING!" if you don't offer cool option for a "Sniffin' Your Pal's Undies" one.
- thought these Jazzbo guys were supposed to be cool cats... but ask one sax player how long his fudge pop is & they drop the act pretty fast.
- theduty: sup girl, you know you can't tell me you haven't thought about me sucking an almond out of your butt. [biebergrl42 is now offline]
- seriously. I don't get it... this Survivors of Rape focus group doesn't seem to like my fancy cocktails OR my high-fives... WHAT GIVES?!?!
- look kids, I don't want you guys to think of me as your substitute teacher, but rather just a regular guy with a super cool wiener piercing.
- this raindance isn't working AT ALL. ...was I supposed to snort peyote off of the Indian kid's ass BEFORE I humped the goat in clown makeup?
- seemed like the perfect gift, but apparently the stick figure baby with X's for eyes won't be joining the family on the back of her minivan.
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Recent Tracks
- Sweet Song by Blur
- For What Reason by Death Cab for Cutie
- After It All by Cat Power
- Yeah You by Shabazz Palaces
- Thank The Lord For The Night Time (mono) by Neil Diamond
- Baudelaire by ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead
- We Are Invisible by Mannequin Men
- Home Protection by Brian Posehn
- Back to Base by Fugazi
DestroyerearwolfJohn MulaneySigur RósMonster RallyM83David BowieReal EstateTy SegallBon IverIGN StaffTalking HeadsRadioheadBeirutDave AttellDavid BazanBOATJames BlakePavementQueenThe Beach BoysPernice BrothersJay-ZThe WrensThe Morning BendersYouth LagoonNeutral Milk HotelMan ManThe Magnetic FieldsSebadohSuperchunkMinutemenDeerhoofRichard BucknerYuckMegafaunThee Oh SeesElvis CostelloSimon & GarfunkelThe Dismemberment PlanDr. DogSlow ClubTom Scharpling and WFMUBowerbirdsNeon IndianBeastie BoysWilcoThe Mountain GoatsGotyeGrizzly Bear- 8 plays
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- Drone by Panda Bear4 plays
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Photos
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Status
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Photos
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