donte

So I am about to go into week 5 of P90X. I am still not happy with how i’m looking. i’m bulking up with muscle a bit but not by much. That’s the easy part. However I need to get rid of this belly fat. I’m going to have to get in there and get this diet thing under control. So I will have a host of post coming soon. Basically me updating my diet to my blog like I did on my old one. I’ll categories them under diet and link them from my D90X landing page.

I’m so excited about how much better i’m going to look. I have to admit the dieting is the hardest part about doing the P90x workout. I can handle dragging my fat tail off the chair to do the exercise it’s just not eating everything in sight that’s the hard part. I’m going to make it though. I’m also going to start eating breakfast. Small snacks throughout the day. Yes!  Time is going so fast!  I want to see real results by week 8. I’m going to push harder and make it happen. Here I go.

my eyes, the cross, more these days

i’m so lonley,  the pain so deep

looking for love, let’s count the ways

the best place to find it is when I sleep

just one song to water your soul

forget not the church where you were no winner

you see him again becoming your goal

the guys left you alone, you little sinner

i found ten sheckles, ill listen on low

that’s the way it should be gay boy

they’ll not see my cross with stones to trow

don’t be loud and show no joy

I’m here because it’s love I need

In my soul is this thirsty seed
.
.
.

So I am going into week three of P90X. I have photos from the start of week 2 but have not edited them yet. It feels good to still be hanging in there and not stopping. I have to admit it’s hard. I get tired, lazy, and part of me just wants to stop. I will not. I am sure once I’m through week three it’s all down hill from there. I am excited about how I am going to look at the end of this.

I am excited about the prospect of feeling good about myself. Right now I don’t like my belly fat. It’s gross and lowers my self esteem. My main focus going into week three is managing my eating. I love food and eat a lot. So my goal will be to better watch what I eat so that it doesn’t counter all the hard work I’m putting in from P90X.  Also going into week three NO TEA. I usually put a lot of sugar in my Tea so going into this week is a no sugar or soda week. Going to take that part one day at a time.

I think once I’m in better shape I’ll find myself getting a lot more of those second looks from guys. Who knows I might even go from this lack of dates phase I’m in to having dates to go on a lot more often. I’ll get those new pics up soon. Might even do it now since I’m sitting here. lol.

Alright well I have a poem that I started typing up but failed to finish to complete and upload. So i’m going to get that up here.

- Donte Edwards | @theamericanxp

16

you thought that id have much to say

you appologize for the pain you breed

about the pain, my heart, that day

the sin is deep inside the seed

there you sit rooted straight

your roots dig deep for holy water

i roll my eyes and close the gate

it’s your soul that you slaughter

now when you knock i need not cry

it’s gone that voice that simply said

i hate this bitch, go fucking die

still in part, his head this bed

My inner Pisces breeds this poem

I chain that fish, it will not roam

.

.

.

14

in the beginning i already knew the end

i must admit that in the start i had my hopes

so no tears and need of my heart to mend

i wish your soul still, would walk the ropes

in the past my mates brought frost

as i brought spring to warm a field unwanted

i crossed the line & our friendships it cost

now upon the weeds & bare field i look haunted

this new field, at a distance i must stay

i feel i’m destined to bring the heat

i don’t want you to freez our crop away

in vain i tell myself you don’t eat meat

In the end i must travel the path to see wehre it goes

While we think we do, no one ever really knows
.

.

.

I am almost through week one of P90X. I am enjoying it. I have been keeping up with my log and the exercise. I am behind on my food log for loseit.com but I will get that under control tonight.

So I haven’t really been tweeting about #p90x to my twitter and Facebook. I have mentioned it but not really gone into much details about this blog or been updating everytime I’m working out.

The reason for that is I would like to get out to week 3 before I really start letting people know I’m back for real. Last time about week three and things feel apart. Right now I really believe I’m doing good. I’m already moving past the 5 – 10 lbs of water weight that you loose first when you start exercising.  I want to have a little evidence behind me, a routine and then I’m going to let the world know I’m doing the damn thing!

I am so excited with where my life could possibly go if I keep focusing. Far to often I start then fall appart. I’m making baby steps this time and i’m going to bring the tea to the table and make it.

So in time someone, someonware out there on this giant planet will read this post and see that i’m almost to the “Pismo” body I want. I can’t wait.

- Donte Edwards | @theamericanxp

13

sitting listing to this sad song

about the good and where it has gone

about the truth i want so wrong

another amf and again on the lawn

leave me there to bleed out my misguided desires

they led me hear with hopes & dreams

kill the voices, their all liars

now inside i have screams

the thoughts of him began to build

not down that road again i go

where is my ice this must be chilled

count it out one, two, three, fo

Not all is grim from such dates

From the pain is born good mates
.
.
.

As many of you know I’m on a mission to get my abs back! A while ago I started p90X but something went wrong. After that failed I signed up for a 1 year gym membership. I’m back again for a serious round two and I’m going to bring it!

When I started P90X a while back I was determined to bring the tea to the table and look good for the coming 2010 gay pride. My mission was to walk shirtless and reap the benefits that where the eyes of gay men admiring what a hot piece of chocolate I was. Anyone following me on twitter/facebook saw my many #p90x post. I also had  a lot of people coaching me on. Though something went wrong. My janky dvd player on my gateway decided it was only going to play my p90x disc when it felt like it! I quickly fell out of routine. I was trying to substitute one disk for another and the whole experience became a mess. It looked like I would be stuck with this belly forever.

Never that! Eventually I went out and got myself a gym membership. At first the cute guy who signed me up talked me into a 3 year agreement. Lucky for me I know a thing are two about long term commitments (#SalleMae) so I was like Phuck that. I also knew better based on the experience’s of my best friend Curtis (@getfun) A three year gym membership commitment would be a huge and expensive mistake.  I went back and switch out to the one year. At least if things feel apart I’d be rid of that mistake quickly and cheaply. However at the time of signing up I knew I was not making a mistake. I was again determined to bring it. Again anyone following me on twitter saw me checking in on foursqure at the gym. Though summer school started and I have not been back to the gym since. In my defense though I was doing aerobics class so it’s not like I was sitting on the bench at wal-mart eating McDonald’s. Oh no my friend never that! or as my friend Chevas (@mightyblacklamb) wold say ” Always up and neva down” lol #insidejoke

Summer school has come to a end, I still have my one year commitment to the gym and life is moving along slowly. I decided I wanted to complete p90x a few days ago. I know it works as I was beginning to see results when my dvd player went wal-mart on me. I hope my little gateway computer can make it 90 more days till i’m done w/ P90X full time.

Life is not simply going to hand me a 6 pack… well maybe it will if it’s beer but I’m talking about ABS! I am going to have to bring it! I hope your ready because I have a huge bag of #P90X and I’ma bout to use it!

Thanks for reading. You can See how i’m doing in my journey here on my workout sheet that I’ll be updating daily! >> Donte’s workout sheet <<

11

i could have the decency to say goodbye

you don’t care you want your fill

i wonder if id even cry

me & you we know the drill

though this time I’ve change the game

you can text or message it’s your call

the ball, my court, i keep the fame

i’ll stay on the bench, i rather not fall

so why not tell you the game is over

i’ll let us die in peace like the start

and stop the calls, send Donte red rover

ive chased you far now it’s your part

It’s all caught up, the pain you inflicted

Rent was due, now your evicted

.

.

.