Have you noticed how no one seems to keep a diary these days? Not a diary for keeping tabs on when to pick up your shirt from the laundry, when to meet with whats-her-face from the bank and so on. No, I mean a proper one! You know, one where you write about what you had for dinner, how your brother/sister/boss/neighbor is an unbelievable pain in the butt, how your parents/wife/husband/dog/cat are being soooo unreasonable, how no one understands you, how that guy or that girl is so unbelievable dreamy and how totally unfair it is that he or she never ever looks at you and so on.
Who actually keeps a diary like that these days? People keep blogs now instead but a blog not a diary because a blog is online. And if it’s online, it can be found by others and if it can be found by others it can be shared, commented on and judged by others…and diaries are not meant to be shared or judged!
That’s because a diary is a place for all things irrational. Its a place to share you fears, your thoughts, your concerns, your failures, your losses and your victories with a silent friend and then read years later by you! Rational or not, big deals or small. Doesn’t matter. A blog just can’t do that.
That is why you hid diaries under the bed, why you always had on with a lock and why you always kept the key for that lock hidden behind the loose wooden board in the wall by the window…or was that just me?
Yes, I used to keep a diary. Several in fact and even had one with a lock. I miss that. It was a long time ago but it was at a point in my life where I really needed somewhere to simply unload without having the load judged or commented on or me being told I was being silly or stupid or irrational. That is the whole point of unloading right there. You just dump it. No needs for comments or opinions because that won’t help you. And a small simple notebook was the perfect place to do so. Still is actually.
I still have some of those diaries around somewhere. At least I think I do. Would be good fun to look through them now nearly a decade later. I imagine it would be an equal mix of head-shaking and surprise at how surprisingly deep and profound one can be when writing things for your own eyes only.
I’ll let you know if I find them.