Megan Brandt
Hope at Home Social Media Manager at ONEHOPE Wine. Dreaming of gourmet kitchens, wine cellars, and a world without Alzheimer's.
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Tweets
- @joshuaziering hope to chat soon!
- Thanks @NatalieHartkopf! Hope you and Rachel have a blast!
- My first @HighTowerGroup #newsletter is live! Summer Installs + HighTower Spotted at @Yammer + We're Hiring: http://t.co/oEzYt2wXZr
- @mweb back in action? @ONEHOPEWINE
- It's burger time (at @UmamiBurgerSf w/ 3 others) http://t.co/ENAm7wVCh9
- Bourbon, please. (at @LocalEditionSf w/ 12 others) [pic]: http://t.co/8seLuMfOYk
- Off the Grid's Picnic at the Presidio: Like a Day in Dolores, But Better Food, Drinks, and Grass http://t.co/XOcqu7oy72
- RT @Upside2Dementia: This $100,000 grant would bring early detection to #LA. Vote to make a difference with the @alzassociation: http:// ...
- RT @mashable: Roger Ebert's Website for Film Reviews Gets Makeover http://t.co/5FgQFIcCWN
- SO proud of my sis for sharing our Dad's story via video! Vote to bring early #Alzheimers detection to #LA: http://t.co/wUSFisETJO #LA2050
- If that was food poisoning, then I'm never eating again. #worstdayever
- @shhhivani Ooo! I better get tickets!!
- Grubbin in the sun! (@ Mission Dolores Park w/ 3 others) http://t.co/n7dLJXQli2
- Making a list of things to do in #SanFrancisco with my mom this weekend! Who wants to help!? #SF
- Proud! RT @upside2dementia: Our blog been recognized as one of the Top Caregiver Stories on the web by @Caring! http://t.co/4fOr6tPCM8
- RT @AptTherapy: Renting Done Right: 10 Inspiring SF Rentals From Our Tours http://t.co/OUTmeYVqKf
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Info
- Social Media & Communications Manager at Hightower GroupMarketing and Advertising | San Francisco Bay Area, USSummary
A young professional with experience in community-based work environments. Over eight years in the service industry and two years in online marketing and brand management. Strong customer service skills with the ability to balance the needs of others in highly structured environments. Confidence in creating original and exciting content to engage community dependent brands.
Specialties: Blogging, Event Coordinating, Social Media, Sales, Networking, Customer Service
Experience- Apr 2013 - PresentSocial Media & Communications Manager / Hightower Group
- Feb 2011 - Feb 2013Hope at Home Social Media Community Manager / ONEHOPE Wine LLC
• Brand development. Creation and daily management of Wordpress blog and social media accounts -- Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Instagram.
• Tracking of overall growth through social analytics and reporting.
• Developed and defined the brand voice by creating original content, seasonal campaigns, and internal communication with our team of Event Specialists.
• Managed weekly blog posts and daily HootSuite engagement for key demographic -- women, ages 25-55.
• Developed and executed the messaging for our frequent campaigns with partner non-profit organizations.
• Dispensed internal communication to our team through creation of online training videos and weekly email updates.
• Formed local and online partnerships, and built relationships with blogger communities and professionals.
• Provided excellent customer service skills to support and offer solutions to issues, questions, and concerns from a diverse customer base.
• Offered leadership and support for my own team of Bay Area Event Specialists.
• Supported re-launch of brand. Redesigned branding, launched e-commerce platform, revised business structure, compensation model, and employee policies. - Sept 2011 - Feb 2012Server / Rose Pistola
- Jun 2009 - Aug 2011Server / Landry's Restaurants
• Delivered exceptional service in fine dining using professional service standards.
• Acquired and demonstrated significant food and wine knowledge.
• Practiced suggestive selling and recommendations.
• Gained excellent communication and customer service skills. - Oct 2007 - Jun 2009Server / Hillstone Restaurant Group
• Gained food knowledge in New American cuisine.
• Audited cash drawer and credit card receipts for closing.
• Provided efficient and friendly service to guests in a team oriented environment. - Jun 2007 - Sept 2007Executive Assistant to the CEO / The Institute for the Development of Enhanced Perceptual Awareness
Performed daily office duties. Coordinated bidding process. Organized production and wrap books. Development research via the Internet. Tracked all projects and created comprehensive spreadsheets. Prepared travel arrangements.
Education- California State University-Long BeachBA in Film and Electronic Media
Additional Information-
Websites:
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Photos
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Posts
- Nov 15, 12
It’s here! The day the Hope at Home team has been waiting for all year! We are beyond excited to share with you the launch of our brand new website!
This is not your average website – it has everything you need and want. Not only is the site designed with the new modern Hope at Home style, it’s a one-stop-shop to planning a wine party with us, and more! Our wine country chic site is loaded with tons of features to help you book your party and even to become a wine specialist yourself! Our new blog will give you insight to our parties and how our brand can help you make an impact in just a couple hours of tasting ONEHOPE Wine. And you’ll always find inspiration for party planning, recipes, DIY projects, and much more!
So, whether you’re planning to host a party, looking to fundraise for your cause, or ready to join our team to start your own flexible cause business – it’s all at your fingertips. We invite you to explore our new look and experience this milestone with us! Be sure to check back often as we’ll be adding bells and whistles along the way. We hope you’ll love it as much as we do!
Many cheers from the new and improved Hope at Home team!
- Nov 01, 12
As we wrapped up 31 inspirational days of pink yesterday, we couldn’t believe just how much everyone came together to create impact during Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Thanks to all the hosts that welcomed us into their homes, we were able to donate 20 mammograms for women in need to the National Breast Cancer Foundation. We met a lot of inspiring people along the way – women who have been touched personally by the disease and women who want to talk about it – like host Mason Miller. A southern girl living in San Francisco with an amazing group of girlfriends, Mason’s story reminds us to keep fighting…
Breast and cancer are never two words you want to see side by side, much less seeing them associated with your Mother. These two words were dropped like bomb shells on my family for the first time in 1997. My two sisters and I were in high school and our single mother was diagnosed with stage 3 Breast Cancer. From that day, I watched my Mother, Jayne battle this horrific disease for the next 12 years.
After three bouts of cancer, the chemotherapy, holistic treatments, prayers and love could no longer keep Mom alive. Since the day Mom was diagnosed until the day she died, I learned so much about cancer, how it literally affects millions and millions of people and how it’s something that does come like a thief in the night. To keep my Mother’s legacy, I have always strived to honor Breast Cancer organizations that raise money and awareness to the disease.
Could Mom’s cancer have been prevented earlier? YES. Could an early stage mammogram have saved her life? PROBABLY, or at least added years onto it. Because life does not allow us regret, early detection is the best way we know how to save others.
This is why I decided to host a Hope at Home party with ONEHOPE Wine. It raised money and awareness for mammograms for women that cannot afford them. It’s a way for women to be social, talk about the disease openly, and find hope in community – all things my Mother loved. It’s a pretty powerful setting when you see women that are close to you, as well as friends of friends walking through your door, all wearing pink with the common theme: let’s help prevent Breast Cancer. I would absolutely encourage anyone to host a party, talk to people that have been involved in the organization and most importantly, get involved and have their friends get involved. Education is power and when money is raised, the two forces can help stop cancer.
This post is dedicated in memory of Mason’s loving Mother – Jayne.
- Oct 30, 12
It’s no secret that we love wine, and any excuse to throw a party. So in the excitement of Halloween, we decided to throw a spooktacular wine tasting party at our Los Angeles office. We filled our space with gorgeous orange and red florals, candlelight that reflected off of mercury glass vases, RIP place cards, and pumpkins. We even found some bottle neckers to label our wines for the occasion. Here’s what happens when a glamorous wine party meets Halloween…
Happy Halloween!
- Oct 19, 12
It’s very possible you’ve seen a trend in the mustache theme over the last few years. Maybe you know all about it, or maybe you just thought the ‘stache’ was making a comeback. Well, it turns out the “mo” (mustache) stands for much more – a movement. During “Movember” each year, men around the world sprout a stache to become walking billboards for men’s health issues, specifically prostate and testicular cancer initiatives.
Since October (breast cancer awareness month) is mostly about women, we want to switch focus and support the men in our lives. While we as women, can’t physically grow a stache, we can be agents of change for men’s health to raise awareness for the 1 in 6 men who will be diagnosed with prostate cancer. And they definitely need our help. Men typically aren’t the party throwers, nor are they very vocal about health issues such as prostate cancer. So grab the girls, decorate with all things mustaches, and support the men in your life with a wine tasting party!
For more hairy ideas, visit our Pinterest board!
- Oct 10, 12
We’ve really embraced the color pink this month. Pink Pinterest boards, pink outfits, even pink cupcakes. So when Wine Wednesday rolled around, we thought why not celebrate with something pink? Things quickly fell into place when we found this pink cocktail recipe made with Chardonnay.
So, today and all month we’ll be making this recipe with our Chardonnay that supports the fight against Breast Cancer. We hope this inspires our hosts to feature this “pink drink” at their Breast Cancer awareness parties this month! It’s pretty, it’s pink, and it stands for so much more!
Cheers!
Blueberry Sangria Lemonade courtesy of Sandra Lee
Ingredients
- 1 1/2 cups frozen blueberries
- 1 (12-ounce) can frozen concentrated pink lemonade
- 1 bottle (750ml) ONEHOPE Chardonnay
- 3 cups lemon lime soda (recommended: Sprite)
- 1/2 cup Cognac like Hennessy
Directions
In a large pitcher, combine all ingredients and stir. Refrigerate for 1 hour to meld flavors.
Serve chilled in iced tea glasses.
Yields 4 cups.
- Oct 03, 12
Since her diagnosis, Giuliana Rancic, has committed all of her focus towards raising breast cancer awareness. After undergoing a double mastectomy, and becoming a new mom, her campaigning brings attention to the 1 in 8 with breast cancer and the importance of early detection through breast self-exams. At her baby shower in June, she celebrated her journey as well as providing guests with our Chardonnay benefiting the fight against breast cancer. We were so honored to be a part of the joyous celebration that was covered in Life&Style Magazine. This is exactly why Hope at Home exists – to celebrate change while spreading hope.
Photo Credit: Elizabeth Messina
- Sep 28, 12
Put the knife down and pick up a paintbrush! The days of carving pumpkins have been replaced with the painted pumpkin – at least when it comes to decorating your home for the fall season. We love this idea for a lot of reasons. Besides being just plain cute, painting pumpkins takes about half the work of a carving job. These adorable centerpiece ideas are sure to get guests buzzing at your next party!
Fill your painted pumpkin with flowers for a stunning centerpiece.
Who doesn’t love chevron? Especially on a pumpkin!
Color blocking works on pumpkins too!
- Sep 20, 12
We recently received a hand-addressed envelope in the mail and were blown away with the most adorable invitation. We immediately knew the theme, thanks to the wine bottle printed on the front of the invite. Without even glancing at the party details, we said “yes please!” Well this got us thinking. We couldn’t remember the last time we received a paper invitation that wasn’t for a wedding. We understand the convenience of sending an Evite or an email blast, but there’s something special about discovering an item in the mailbox other than junk. Maybe we’re a little old fashioned, but how cute are the invitations below that we found on Etsy? So, next time you’re hosting a ONEHOPE Wine party and getting ready to send an Evite, think about a snail mail delivery. You may have to plan ahead a bit, but your guests will have a hard time turning your invite down!
- Sep 13, 12
On Tuesday we traded in the girl talk, creative hors d’oeuvres, and cute floral arrangements for office chairs, florescent lighting, and an abundance of men in suits at Cantor Commercial Real Estate‘s Los Angeles office. Every Cantor employee is touched by 9/11 since their New York office lost two-thirds of its team in the attacks on the World Trade Center in 2001. Following the fatalities, Cantor Relief Fund and Charity Day were formed as a way to remember the fallen and aid the surviving victims.
Gathering after work in their office to toast to NYC, the LA team felt proud to participate in the fundraising efforts and remembrance. Making a difference tasted good as guests nibbled on treats from Bouchon that paired well with the hit of the night, ONEHOPE Cabernet. Something about men and Cabernet… they just love it! They also loved that we donated 10% of the wine sales from their party to the Cantor Relief Fund. While it was a smaller donation compared to what Charity Day raised in total, it was the act of joining together and spreading awareness that filled them with hope as they remembered their loved ones. Cantor Fitzgerald donates 100% of transactions every September 11 – this year a whopping $12 million!
This September 11th, we brought change into the office, mirroring ONEHOPE’s mantra ‘Feel Something Now’. This small team will continue to bring change each year, and we hope it can lead to inspiring you in some way too.
- Sep 06, 12
We’re on a hunt. No, not a scavenger hunt or anything like that. We’re on a hunt to put the color pink in the spotlight. For us, pink is much more than nail polish and cotton candy – it’s a bold color that stands up to a fight. It’s the color that represents our breast-cancer-fighting Chardonnay. By donating half of our Chardonnay profits to the National Breast Cancer Foundation, we’re helping provide mammograms to women in need. Early detection can save lives. That’s why we support pink all year long.
Next month especially, the color will be in the spotlight during Breast Cancer Awareness Month. Hundreds of thousands of people will come together to take a stand to raise awareness and funds for the disease. Well we want to be part of the action too. Our goal is to make it as easy as possible for people to make a difference. So, here’s how easy it is: For every event booked during the month of October, we will donate a mammogram to a woman in need through the National Breast Cancer Foundation. AND, we will also donate to any Breast Cancer related charity of the hosts’ choice through event sales.
So really all you have to do is open your home to ONEHOPE Wine and your friends, and drink for pink. And just like that, you’ll have provided a mammogram to someone who needs it. You never know, it could be a life saving mammogram. So if you’re up for throwing a party, we have some ideas on our Pinterest board, Drink for Pink to make the fighting color center stage at your wine tasting.
Okay, so maybe our hunt is more like a mission, but you get the picture.
A taste of the party planning ideas you’ll find on our Pinterest board!
Californians – To host an event and provide a mammogram during the month of October, visit us here!
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Posts
- Apr 10, 13
I used to cringe when the phone would ring. I even had to change my ring tone at one point because it gave me such anxiety. The only calls I get now are from the staff at the VA informing me of little incidents that happen involving my Dad. It's standard protocol and it's usually nothing serious. For example, the nurse called to tell me that a resident tried to punch my Dad but missed, then my Dad tried to punch him back whereupon he missed and accidentally hit the nurse. Picturing these two old men trying to hit each other is actually pretty funny. Too bad the nurse got hit though.
But here is the craziest and funniest call yet:
(this is verbatim from my voicemail except I changed the name)
"Hi Kristen, this is Kendra, I'm a nurse at the Memory Care unit where your Father is at. Um, another resident tried to lift your Father off a toilet and they both fell... in the shower floor. Um, right now there are no signs or symptoms of injury with your Father... um can you please give us a call back if you have any questions."
Do I have questions? Yes, I have sooooo many questions. How... what... why... ????
I'm just glad that Dad doesn't seem to be instigating all these incidents and that for the most part he is adapting well. - Mar 19, 13Upside to Dementia has been named one of the top caregiver stories on the Web by Caring.com! How wonderful and what a nice recognition! In a couple of paragraphs, the writer really touches on what this whole journey is about for us: Laughter, Family, Alzheimer's, Healthcare, and the struggle financially to find Dad a home with good care. To read the quick blurb about us, click here.
My weekly visits with Dad have been very pleasant. We walk up and down the hallways (Emry especially loves that since she is learning to walk), we stare out the many large windows in the facility and Dad points out people walking outside on the grass (you can probably see Emry's little hand prints along the glass), and I get to know more and more of the staff at the VA. They all take quite an interest to how Dad reacts around me and are happy to see that he is smiley, silly, and affectionate.
As for his incontinence issues, I ordered Dad two jumpsuits that zip up the back, so that he will not be able to go to the bathroom anywhere other than his diaper. He will also not be able to sprinkle his feces around the facility either. Wow, I just wrote about sprinkling feces as if it was a normal activity... so weird...
Anyway, I never got around to explaining the financial aspects of Dad's new home. The VA will take 70% of his monthly income. What a relief. They also require that he enroll in Medicare and assured me that the VA will pay all his penalties! Aside from clothes and a few toiletries, the VA will pretty much take care of everything. We are really very lucky to have secured him a spot in this beautiful and well managed facility.
So, now that Dad has a little bit of money in the bank, I can get him some much needed new clothes! For starters... some elastic waist jeans. Weighing in at 135, he is just skin and bones and his clothes are just hanging on him. I talked to the dietician about starting him on some Ensure. - Mar 01, 13I'm sure you're all sitting on pins and needles waiting to hear how my Dad is doing! Or maybe you've been relieved not to see an upsetting blog post. Needless to say, here's the latest update...
I had Dad's two week assessment yesterday via phone. During the past two weeks, I have been in contact with the home and visited Dad as well and everything appeared to be just fine. But, it seems Dad is showing his true colors.
What I really like about this home, is that the caregivers work as a team. On the phone yesterday was the Psychologist, the Dietician, the Caregivers, the Activity Coordinator etc. So each person had their turn to let me know how he is adjusting.
The main concern seem to be his incontinence. Dad and his urination! We didn't keep this a secret when he moved in, and warned the staff that they will need to prompt him to use the toilet every couple of hours to prevent erratic urination. I guess they weren't really implementing that system the past two weeks. So, when they caught him urinating twice yesterday and tried to redirect him, he responded by hitting one nurse in the chest and another nurse in the face. (two different incidents)
Then they asked me, "Has he ever tried to pick up his feces?" Well, that's a new one! I was trying to picture him reaching into the toilet when they informed me that he reaches into his pants (and into his adult diaper), pulls out the feces, and drops it on the ground. Oh. Gross.
I was under the impression that he usually used the toilet for this type of thing, but I'm sure with the confusion of a new home and new staff, he has started going in his pants which feels very uncomfortable for him (obviously). This is how I responded, "Well, apparently he is 'with it' enough to know that he is uncomfortable and tries to solve the problem by putting his hand down there, but he is not 'with it' enough to get to the bathroom in time." I'm not really sure there is a solution to this problem. Hopefully the staff will keep prompting him to use the toilet and that will help.
The other main concern is Dad's aggression and hitting. I don't have any solution to that problem, but when I visited him today, the psychologist informed me that they were having another team meeting today but this time with the Doctors. Dad's medicine has been helping so much, but there could always be that perfect cocktail of drugs that could help even more. I guess we'll see.
I could tell the psychologist is a little worried about Dad's behavior, especially the hitting. But he kept telling me not to worry and that an adjustment period is completely normal. I just don't want Dad to get kicked out.
Here is a picture of Dad's peekaboo Ocean View from his room: - Feb 15, 13Yesterday was my Dad's last moving day ever. He is now at his final stop... The Veteran's Home of California West Los Angeles (near Wilshire and the 405, for those of you not familiar with the area, it is just east of Santa Monica).
He was in bright spirits as we sat in LA traffic listening to Rosemary Clooney, Frank Sinatra, and Ray Charles, and continued to be happy throughout the hour and a half of paperwork. We shared a Valentine's Day doughnut and he sipped his coffee with a pleasant smile on his face.
The entire building is beautiful, state of the art, and everywhere you look, there are huge windows with quintessential views of Los Angeles -- palm trees, greenery, hills, spanish-style buildings, and a little bit of haze of course. On a good day, you can see the ocean and all the way to Palos Verdes from Dad's new room which is basically a square area with a hospital style bed since he is technically living within the skilled nursing portion of the housing. But, he has a flat screen TV in his room. Too bad, he'll never use it.
We met with the Nurses and Doctors to go over Dad's health history and his family history. Around that time, my Mom arrived after battling for over 3 hours in LA traffic to lend a helping hand. And by lunchtime, Dad was starting to get anxious.
I had run out to my car, and when I came back I could hear my Mom trying to pacify Dad before I even joined them in the dining room. He was done eating, done sitting, and done being told what to do. He kept trying to grab random silverware and plates from other tables. As I was scarfing down my food, I suggested that they take a walk outside. Sometimes the best thing to do is let him walk it off. At this point, he was becoming distrustful of us and would not listen to our directions, so we were basically following him.
That's when we realized he had not received his morning meds or his mid-day meds. After coaxing him into an elevator, we got him back up to the Doctor's office. Since they had not written any orders for his meds, and he was not in their system yet, they could not administer the pills to him.
Originally, the entire moving process was supposed to be completed by 2:00, so instead of cancelling my afternoon performance with The Sassy Songbirds, my Mom and I agreed that she could handle the last hour and make sure he was unpacked. So, by 1:00, my anxious and aggravated Dad had not started unpacking, had not begun his physical, and was still a few hours away from being all settled in.
With a pit in my stomach, I left the two of them there. I think by 2:00, they administered Dad's medicine, and in the meantime tried to perform a physical on him where he fought the nurse, the doctor, and my Mom the entire time. They finally gave up on finishing the exam. By 3:00, the meds were kicking in and my Dad helped my Mom unpack his suitcase. She was out of there by 4:00, and sat in two more hours of traffic before she got to my house for a quick glass of wine.
What a crazy and exhausting day. It worries me that the staff witnessed Dad's bad side on his first day of being there. But, they also saw how his meds do seem to regulate his moods and behavior, so that is good. As usual, all we do now is wait.
I did read a clause during all my paperwork signing that informed me of a 60 day probationary period to make sure Dad is a good fit with the home. I didn't ask for any details, and I hope that I never have to hear about it again. This has got to be Dad's final stop.
The financial aspect of this entire process is very interesting (in a good way), but I will have to share that in a separate post, because it's a lot to take in. In the meantime, here are some photos from Dad's new home:The Entrance to Dad's HomeDad's roomOne of the outdoor spaces.Gorgeous Los Angeles views seen from almost every window! - Feb 01, 13Okay people... this is big news! Bigger than the Inauguration, Bigger than the Super Bowl, Bigger than Awards Season.... even bigger than my 20 pound cat!
Drum roll please...
Dad has an admission date for the West Los Angeles VA!
I called last week and left the following message at the admissions office.... "Hello, this is Kristen Hardin and I am calling regarding my Dad, Melvin Brandt. He is on the wait list for the Memory Care Facility and I am hoping for some more specifics on when he may be admitted. I contacted my congressman this morning and am scheduling an appointment with his office to discuss how he can facilitate this process as well. Please let me know what information I can bring to him so that he can be the most helpful to this situation. Thank you."
I got a call the very next day saying they were going to review his file and call me no later than next Friday (today). Sure enough, the phone rang today and she was delighted to give the good news of an admission date for my Dad. He is very lucky because after him, they will have admitted the first 30 residents and will be stopping the admissions process for an undetermined amount of time.
The date is February 14th, V-day. (V for Veteran of course!) - Jan 15, 13Dad became a Grandpa!Celebrating a great assessment at the West Los Angeles VA1st of 3 Staph Infections this yearGetting kicked out of the cheaper facility we tried to move him toDad's black eye and head bump from his time in the Geriatric Psych WardCrawling, not walking, because of his new MedsHaving a sweet moment with MeganCelebrating at Dad's Christmas Party!
- Dec 20, 12I think about Dad the most this time of year. It's no secret that Dad wasn't the easiest or nicest person to be around growing up, but somehow when Christmas rolled around, that person disappeared for a little while. He wanted to bring a wonderful Christmas to our home. In the time we all lived under one roof, Dad succeeded at this.He was always the first person awake and waiting for us to peak around the corner to see what Santa brought us. He loved opening presents as much as we did. He was like a kid. Shaking packages and making guesses as to what was inside. One piece of tape at a time - no one ever opened presents as slowly as Dad did. Sometimes we had to lend a hand to speed up the process. I remember we would stick bows to the top of his slightly balding head. Afterwards, he filled our breakfast plates with a stack of our french toast tradition. It was my favorite day of the year.When we got older and Dad lived on his own, he still came over for Christmas day. I woke up early, waiting by the window for his truck to appear in the driveway. I knew he was the signal for Christmas to start. He still took his sweet time unwrapping presents and cried every time we gave him a framed picture of me and my sister. He spent the day with us but it was always sad to see him go home to an empty house.Next week will be our 4th Christmas without Dad. I don't know if Christmas will ever feel the same without him. Thankfully, these memories of Dad are real. I cling to them tight because that's all I can do. Our family continues to make new traditions and this year is the first Christmas with my sweet niece, Emry. I wish so much she could experience Grandpa like we did on Christmas day, but we will make sure to carry on traditions of Christmas past.
Life moves fast and things can change with the blink of an eye. Be sure to pause and take in moments with the ones you love this Christmas because you never know when a memory is all you have left of someone.
-MeganSome things never change. Bows on Dad's head a couple Christmases ago.Merry Christmas! - Dec 19, 12With the big holiday fast approaching, here is my wish for everyone this holiday season...
Sit down with your Parents and Grandparents and ask them about their life, their childhood, their favorite memories, or their favorite recipe... Whatever it may be, take the chance to savor and learn about whatever it is that makes them who they are! You never know when those loved ones will be taken from you physically or mentally. - Dec 09, 12I am happy to share that I had a wonderful time with my Dad yesterday! Valley View Gardens was having their huge family Christmas Party, and I was the singing entertainment. Honestly, I didn't think my Dad would even notice that I was singing and I imagined him wandering off, losing interest, or even just falling asleep in his chair. That was not the case at all. My dad, the ham, made an appearance yesterday and it sent my heart soaring!
Right before I started singing, the Director introduced me and then gave a shout out to my Dad which resulted in applause from the audience. Noticing the clapping, my Dad raised his head, looked around, and then put both hands to his mouth and blew a huge kiss to everyone. The place erupted in laughter. I think my mouth dropped open. He was so alert and so funny. It's been months since I've seen him that way.
Throughout the performance, Dad would smile at me, nod his head, raise his eyebrows up and down and then eventually started dancing and singing. At one point we were holding hands and swaying to The Christmas Song... I think the lyrics were "And so I'm offering this simple phrase to kids from 1 to 92...." and I lost it. The tears were suddenly in my eyes, and I just pulled Dad into a hug and we danced. I didn't care who was watching, all I could think was how tough this year was. So often the doctor's appointments and errands get in the way of quality time with him and he becomes a "patient" instead of my Dad. When was the last time that we just had fun together?
So, Christmas came early for me and my Dad. I know how blessed I am to have had that moment with him yesterday. Those tidbits are few and far between now, but thanks to this blog, I'll be able to look back at this day and remember it vividly.
Merry Christmas to everyone who supports us and follows our story. Let me end this post with a little bit of 'baby love'. :) - Nov 14, 12From the title of this blog, I'm sure you can guess what I'm going to write about. Dad's too doped up. He is on so much medication that he is losing his motor skills and is sleeping too much. He is unable to feed himself now and he has resorted to crawling on the ground sometimes instead of walking. When the staff told me about that latter incident, I knew we had to take action and that meant going to the ER again. (meanwhile, the staff at Valley View suspended some of his medication because they were also concerned)
We arrived at the ER yesterday around noon and didn't end up leaving until after 4. Everyone at the VA is so incredibly helpful and nice to my Dad, but the waiting just takes a toll. My Mom showed up and took baby duty in the waiting room while I stayed in the ER with my Dad. Let me just say though, Dad was 'with it' enough to get mad at me a few times yesterday. Understandably, we were all tired of waiting, but Dad just wanted to pace around and kept going into the nurses station. When I tried to stop him he said, "I'm not going nowhere. Shut up." I literally laughed out loud. Wow! That sentence made perfect sense. Then when he noticed that I had resorted to just following him around the ER, he told me under his breath that I was pissing him off. My response? "You're pissing me off too Dad!"
Finally, we were sent to the Psych office. The main objective was to get the dosage of his Depakote Prescription lowered significantly and that did get accomplished. By that time, Emry was ready for her next meal and way overdue for a nap, so my mom and I switched duties and she got my Dad back to Valley View Gardens safely.
It's going to take a while for the Depakote to start diminishing in his system. When I stopped by Valley View to drop off his prescription this morning, I found my Dad on all fours in the dining room. He is so confused and once he's down there, he can't get up. On the other hand, he is now able to pick up his fork, but instead of using it to eat, he tried to poke the nurse with it when she attempted to take it away from him. If it's not one thing, it's another.
On another note, The Alzheimer's Association had me come back to their office to speak to their Board of Directors on Monday. After sharing my Dad's story, one woman said, "Wow, you're 29. That's what we need. We need young people to care about this disease." I couldn't agree more. - Nov 08, 12
As many of you know, I was Co-Chair for the 2012 Long Beach Walk to End Alzheimer's and the fabulous news is.... the walk was a success!
Last year's goal was to raise $100,000 and we met it....
This year's goal was to raise $120,000 and we are currently at $127,000 and counting!
As a team, our goal was to raise $5000. Ten days before the walk, we were at $3900 and we made one more push - emailed friends, family, co-workers- and as of today, we raised (drum roll please).... $5865!! (And my neighbor will try to get his employer (Exxon Mobil) to match his donation and so our total should be just over $6000!) AMAZING!!!!!!!!
I just want to extend a HUGE Thank you to everyone who pitched in and supported us! I also want to thank everyone who walked with us... we had people come from San Diego to San Fransisco join us on the walk! We are very blessed.
During my time as Co-Chair, I was able to meet many wonderful people associated with The Southland Chapter of the Alzheimer's Association and they invited to come speak at their All-Staff meeting earlier this week. At the end of their meetings, they like to inspire the staff with a personal story. I was extremely excited and honored to share our story two days ago at the Los Angeles Office. I spoke about my Dad, the financial toll it's taken on our family, and even read some excerpts from my past blogs.
When I was writing my speech, I researched what the Association and our country have accomplished toward the fight against Alzheimer's. I would like to share a few of these accomplishments:
First of all, almost right away, President Obama lifted the (Bush) ban on federal resources going towards Stem Cell Research. Next, with the urging of the Alzheimer's Assoc., he signed the National Alzheimer's Project Act, and lastly he is pushing for $156 Million increase in funding over the next two years to battle the disease (this amount of money is nothing compared to the debilitating cost our country will face in the future as more and more people are diagnosed with the disease). These are STUNNING accomplishments in only the last couple years. So, needless to say, I am happy about the outcome of this election, and I am hopeful for a future without Alzheimer's.
My Audience at the Alzheimer's Association: - Nov 04, 12Happy Birthday Dad. Today you are 73 years old. In the past year you became a Grandpa but you also had many mishaps and challenges as your Alzheimer's disease is battling to take over. We miss you so much.
We've resigned ourselves to the fact that you have succumbed to Alzheimer's and most days are just business as usual. But, I always find myself grieving on November 4th. Because it's your day, Dad. And it's okay to grieve once in a while.
So, today Megan and I both shed a tear for you. We love you and miss you. - Oct 23, 12So, as I stated a couple weeks ago, the West Los Angeles VA home has opened and since Dad is only number 13 on the list, we are hoping for the move to happen soon. Unfortunately when I called for an update last week, I was told that they are going to stop at #10 because they need to hire more staff.
It was all I could do to keep it together on the phone. Who knows how long this newest hiccup can set us back. I let the woman know (again) that Dad has a high financial need and that this whole situation sounds like really bad news. By the end of the conversation, she assured me that they were already starting the hiring process. She also said that since he is number 13, that he will hopefully be moving in within a month or so. (That sounds naively optimistic to me). I'm not holding my breath. - Oct 23, 12We are five days away from the Long Beach "Walk to End Alzheimer's" and team UpsidetoDementia has surpassed it's goal of raising $5000! $5150 raised so far and 25 team members signed up! It's our biggest group yet! In addition to being a team captain with my Sister, I am also the co-chair for the walk and will be MC'ing the entire event on Saturday.
Our fundraiser at a local restaurant called McKenna's on the Bay was a huge success and we raised about $950 for the team. Donations have been pouring in from all over... Family members, Friends and Facebook Friends, OneHope Wine employees, my Mom's Bunco and Bible Study groups. I even have friends who are asking their classmates or family members to help out as well. THANK YOU to everyone for their support and donations!
This pictures is from our fundraiser. More pictures and details to come after the walk! And, we will have a grand total of money raised as well! It feels good to fight the good fight.
p.s. Not a peep from Dad since he got back from the Psych Ward. :) - Oct 11, 12
I picked Dad up from the Psych Ward today. He had been there for 8 days. I talked to the Doctor a couple of days ago to get an update and learned that Dad had fallen down which resulted in a bump on his head. They did a CT scan and everything was fine, but I definitely wasn't expecting to see him look like this when I got there today:
Talk about a bump! And what about that Black Eye? Apparently they were doing rounds in the middle of the night, and found him on the floor of his room. I guess he fell out of bed or was trying to walk around in the dark and knocked into something and then fell. Anyway, it's nothing serious and at least he seems happy, but he looks pretty beat up. The good news is that Dad seemed more focused and responsive today than he has in a long time.
Okay, so let's talk Meds. The Doctor told me he put Dad on Namenda which is an Alzheimer's drug... but a step up from Aricept. It's used for the later stages of dementia. He also put Dad on Depakote (Valproic Acid) to help control the moods or mood swings... it is sometimes used in ADHD kids to help control outbursts and aggression... so that seems to make sense for Dad.Then he gave Dad a Haldol Dec... which is a shot of Haloperidol that Dad would get once a month. This is an anti-psychotic. There is a warning against using it on Dementia patients, but there was also a warning on Seroquel and he has been on that for about a year now. On top of helping with hallucinations and uncontrollable motor and verbal tics, Haloperidol is also used to treat confusion and difficulty thinking and understanding that is caused by severe physical or mental illness.And he still has Dad on Seroquel, but reduced the dosage to just 25 mg/day.The problem now is getting the Meds. Since this doctor is not associated with the VA, I'm not sure how to get the meds switched over into the VA system. For the moment, we are just going to pay out of pocket and when Dad moves to Los Angeles, he will get a whole new set of Doctors and we can deal with it then. BUT, the drug Namenda is $300!!! The charge nurse at Valley View Gardens thinks that since Dad is in such an advanced stage of Alzheimer's, this drug is not necessary and since it's so expensive, we are going to drop it for the moment. Depakote is $95, so that's not bad and it's the most important.Let's hope these new drugs and adjustments help. - Oct 04, 12
Woo Hoo!!! We just got news that the West Los Angeles VA home has finally opened. They have already moved in two residents and are hoping to do 1-3 residents per week. Dad is number 13. When I spoke to the admissions coordinator, she could not give me any specifics on my Dad's exact move-in date, but I'm hoping for mid-November at the latest. That way we only have to pay Valley View Gardens for October and then they can pro-rate our days in November, so we won't go over budget again.
(Now if they would have only returned my phone calls last week, then I wouldn't have moved my Dad and we wouldn't have had all this drama. But it did force us to deal with Dad's behavioral issues, so I guess everything happens for a reason.) - Oct 04, 12
It takes a village to care for my Dad. And that Village came out in full support the past few days. There have been some developments in the past two days that could not have happened without our Village.
Valley View Gardens has been so accommodating and we are so lucky that they took him back into the home. They also still have us at the discounted rate, even though it's over our budget, but I know they are doing everything in their power to help us. Thankfully, some of our family members have donated money towards Dad's care this month, so that lightens the burden a little on that front as well.
Also, because I am the Co-Chair for the Long Beach Alzheimer's Walk, I have started making some wonderful friends in the Alzheimer's community. Once I told my Co-Chair about my Dad's behaviors, she put me in touch with a trusted Geriatric Psychiatrist friend of hers. We figured out that since my Dad has Medicare Part A, it will cover an admittance to a psych ward where he can have his behaviors monitored. Everything happened so fast, but I knew this was the next step, so when I got the call yesterday morning that they would take him, I agreed to it.
They wanted to pick him up in an Ambulance, and I put a stop to that real quick. The last ambulance bill we had was for $1000 and it took a year to get that taken care of. So, I called my good friend, Colby, who my daughter just happens to love and asked if I could drop the baby off at her house. I just knew it would be easier and faster with my Dad if I had two free hands.
My Dad and I continued on to Anaheim General Hospital where they checked him out at the ER. We were only there about two hours, and Valley View Gardens had a contact who met us at the door and welcomed us in. Finally they agreed to admit him to the off-campus facility in Buena Park where the Psych Ward is located. The Doctor even said to me, "Usually we transport him by ambulance, and I will probably get in trouble for doing this, but I will let you drive him there." It just seems like everyone was making an exception for us, or calling in a favor. We are so thankful.
A few more words about this whole psych ward thing. It seems extreme, but I think this is absolutely necessary because although all his behaviors are not uncommon for an Alzheimer's patient, they have become so bad that it's affecting his care and could ultimately jeopardize his place in his future home at the VA facility. The behaviors I am referring to include: Peeing all over the walls, masturbating and disrobing in public places, refusing showers and grooming, being combative and aggressive, walking the hallways at 2 AM and ultimately disrupting other residents by getting into their beds... the list goes on.
So, for the first time in three years, I have a peace of mind and a calmness surrounding me. For seven days, I won't get phone calls filled with bad news, I won't get complaints about Dad's behavior, and I won't have to worry about him getting kicked out, because this is a psych ward and I am sure they have seen it all.
So, thank you to "The Village" that made everything easier this week. Thank you to Valley View Gardens, my Co-Chair Janie and her Gero Psych friend Dr. Macina, my baby-sitter and best friend Colby, and to my family for helping out with the financial burden. And of course, the undying support from Blake (who made me a fabulous martini when I got home last night), Megan, my Mom and all the family and friends who passed on their encouragement this week. - Oct 02, 12
Well, we didn't have to wait long for something to go wrong. Dad's new home kicked him out after only three and a half days. While there is nothing funny about this situation, I couldn't help but crack a smile when I told my Mom and her response was, "What!?!? Already?".
Yesterday morning I came to pick him up for a Podiatry Appointment. The Marketing/Admissions lady said she wanted to speak to me, but we were just barely on time for the appointment, so I asked if I could talk to her after. She agreed but quickly told me that Dad has been acting up... (Now in the past, I have glossed over some of the more embarrassing or odd behaviors for the sake of keeping my Dad's dignity intact, but now I feel compelled to share them a little more honestly with my readers because these behaviors are not who my Dad is... He is basically a walking and sometimes talking version of a disease called Alzheimer's and that's it. So I am going to share the good, bad, and ugly.)
She said he was publicly disrobing, he was masturbating in the lobby, he crawled into a man's bed, he took his shoe off during dinner and threw it on the table, he stole a butter knife from the dining room and was apparently brandishing it as a weapon, and he had been aggressive. Well, of course none of this is news to me. He has done all this before and there is obviously an adjustment period that he would go through being in a new home.
When we came back from the Doctor, the managing director was gone, so I figured I would speak to her later in the day. I returned at 4:00 and was asked to come into the office whereupon they basically told me that he needs to leave and if I would not take him then they would have an ambulance come take him to the ER. "His behaviors are putting people in danger and are inappropriate for the facility." That was it. There was no discussion. It was a very cold conversation that left me feeling like they were blaming me for his behaviors.
I was just sitting there with a baby in my lap who was ready to eat and had a wet diaper all while trying to figure out my next move. I ended up calling Valley View Gardens (Dad's old home) and through my tears, begged for them to let me bring him back there. Their response, "He's our family. Bring him back home." Blake arrived shortly after to pick up Emry and we had my Dad out of there within the hour.
The worst part is that we are out $500. We paid for the four days Dad was at the new home plus a non-refundable community fee of $250. And, we are still going to be paying Valley View Gardens for October which is $700 over Dad's budget. A total of $1300 that we don't really have. We're screwed.
I'm working on a few things to get Dad's behaviors under control. This cannot happen when he eventually moves into the new VA home. More info to come on that ....
Why can't my Dad just be that 'normal' Alzheimer's patient who stares at the floor and sits quietly by himself? And why is this my life? Why can't anything go smoothly? And my biggest complaint is... DON'T CALL YOURSELF AN ALZHEIMER'S HOME IF YOU CAN'T DEAL WITH AN ALZHEIMER'S PATIENT!!!!!!
(below is a picture of Dad in a jumpsuit that fastens up the back so he can't pee or disrobe in public... I took this as we were leaving the home for good.)
I call this photo "Dejected & Rejected" - Sep 28, 12
Today we moved my Dad.
Since we still hadn't heard from the VA Facility in Los Angeles, we had to make a decision. Valley View Gardens gave my Dad a BIG discounted rate the entire year and two months that he lived there. They could not go any lower and Dad's money ran out.
We found a more affordable option in an 'okay' neighborhood in Long Beach. The monthly rate is actually $300 less than his monthly income, so at this point, if the Los Angeles VA home doesn't work out, Dad could actually stay at this place forever. It's not the Ritz, but the hallways are wide, the walls are all freshly painted, there is plenty of outdoor space... and for the moment, Dad has his own room. It's called Bellagio Manor. (we joked because if someone wants to know where my Dad lives, we could say in an impressive tone , "Oh, he lives at The Bellagio.") Haha.
The move went off without a hitch. But that doesn't mean that I didn't have a pit in my stomach all day which ultimately left me exhausted both physically and emotionally. This is Dad's third home in 2 1/2 years and we are still hoping for one more move whenever the VA home opens. We all know that the adjustment period of a move is a long and challenging one. After the last move there was a two week calm before the storm, and then things got a little crazy. So, now we wait...
click below to see the website for Bellagio
Bellagio Manor
Here is a picture of some of the caregivers at Valley View saying Goodbye to my Dad... - Sep 07, 12Well, it's September and Dad still hasn't moved to the new West LA Veterans Home. Our family is scraping up the extra money he needs to pay for his care. But I'm starting to think that we might need to move him temporarily until the VA opens... $700 extra is what he needs per month and that is just too much. Ugh... moving.On another note, Dad has scabies AGAIN. This is his 4th or maybe 5th time... I don't know because I stopped counting. I walked into his home to pick him up for a routine Psych visit and took one look at him and knew. He was scratching in all the same places. Luckily since we were going to the VA clinic already, I begged and pleaded to be seen so that we could get the medicine he needed for his skin. Success! I saw the problem, tackled it, and solved it all within hours! All with a baby on my hip and one eye on the old guy with Alzheimer's! Sorry for tooting my own horn, but normally the Scabies situations are much more drawn out. (Although, the Nurse Practitioner didn't think it was scabies -why is it so hard to diagnose?- and I politely told her that I disagreed. At this point, I know exactly what it looks like and how my Dad reacts to it, plus I did find out later when we arrived back at Valley View Gardens, that another resident also has Scabies.)Scabies is highly contagious but I have never contracted it from him... my main worry this time was Emry. I made sure she had absolutely no contact with him, and I probably washed my hands 20 times that day.Dad also had another staff infection but this time in his armpit and it was really painful. We opted to go to urgent care instead of sitting for hours at the VA ER. $200 later, they gave him a very painful injection of Lidocaine, lanced it open, squeezed the heck out of it, and sent us home with an antibiotic and an order to come back two days later. Again, I washed my hands countless times that day.Anyway, wish there was more exciting news to tell. The Alzheimer's Walk is less than two months away and we're having a big fund-raiser at the end of the month. More info on that coming soon!Below is a picture of Dad and his favorite nurse at the VA Clinic in Whittier. She is so good to him. Thank you Vanessa!
- Jul 19, 12(Wish I knew what was going on in that head...)Anyway, so many developments in the last 48 hours. Mostly good in the sense that we have solutions to the problems for now.I was kind of afraid to visit Dad's home alone because the Head Nurse was clearly very annoyed with me on the phone even though I did what she asked (refill the Xanax) and could do nothing more until it arrived. In her defense, I didn't return her phone call the other day mostly because I had no news for her, but I know that added to her frustration.Our conversation with her was a mixture of confusion and frustration on the part of all involved. Turns out, they have Xanax. I was so bewildered... what does she want from me? Isn't that what she wanted? After 10 minutes of the most dizzying conversation both my Mom and I said, "But you have Xanax? We don't understand?"Bottom line is that the Xanax is not working and they were so mad that we were not there to take him out of the home and to the Mental Health Department. Turns out the VA does have an urgent care Mental Health Office that will take Walk-Ins. So, I promised we would take him the very next morning.When we arrived at the Mental Health office the next day, I was informed that they don't take walk-ins. But here I was, young lady with a baby and a Dad with Alzheimer's and I told her that his home could possibly kick him out because of his behavior. They took pity on us. Plus Emry kept smiling at every person that passed by. How do you say no to that?We were seen pretty quickly and everyone was incredibly helpful and NICE. That makes such a difference. I gotta say, I'm really starting to Love the VA.After we started going through all his medications, we found out that his Seroquel had been discontinued. This drug helps with anxiety, sexual behaviors, sun-downers etc. Dad had been doing so well on it and I have no idea why his Psychiatrist DC'd it.(The psychiatrist it turns out has really screwed things up. We had talked about discontinuing ONLY the Xanax at Dad's last appointment. It looks like he did the Seroquel instead. BUT, Valley View Gardens has hand-written notes from the Doctor saying that he discontinued the Ambien. What the heck. Get it together!)Long story short, because I really could give much more detail.... we got that medication reinstated for now. Although, when I got it refilled, they only gave us 10 pills. So, now I need to figure out how to get more. Plus, Valley View Gardens still needs a bunch of paperwork from the Doctor's. So, I called Dad's Primary Care Doctor but they had no appointments until August. This morning I called twice asking if they had any cancellations and viola! we got an appointment for 2:00 this afternoon. I'm determined to get this all behind us, get Dad back on the right meds, and keep the peace with Valley View Gardens.Below is a pic of Grandpa and Emry and a video of Dad....
- Jul 17, 12
On top of everything that I just posted about Dad's aggressive behavior, I did hear back from the West Los Angeles VA home about a possible move-in date. The facility did not pass the government survey, but has since made the corrections that needed to be made. Apparently they are hoping to get the okay this week. I have no idea when move-ins would start, but I found out that Dad is #13 on the list. Here's the catch -- they are only going to take 1-2 residents per week at first so that everyone can adjust properly. That means Dad wouldn't move in for at least 6 weeks from when they start moving people in... and we don't even know when that will be.
So let me sum up all the aspects of my Dad's life that stresses me out. No Money. No move-in date. Aggressive Behavior. Dad is jeopardizing the only good thing that he has right now: Valley View Gardens -- who have been more than accommodating with his budget and behavior.
Mom and I are going over there shortly to talk to them.
A Friend of mine also sent me a link to an article about Veteran's homes sitting empty... like the one my Dad is supposed to move into. Click Below.
Veterans Homes - Jul 17, 12Not good news today. Actually terrible news. We've been trying to get Dad's Xanax refilled because his behavior is becoming more difficult for The Valley View Gardens staff to deal with. He won't cooperate to shower, or get dressed, or basically do anything that he doesn't want to do and he responds by trying to hit or punch the staff. Megan and I both know that even though he is 72 and has severe Alzheimer's, Dad can still pull out that mean, scary side when he wants. He even hit one of the pregnant staff members the other day.The Xanax is taking forever because it was discontinued due to the fact that the doctor didn't want him on Ambien, Seroquel, and Xanax all at once. So, I had to request that it be renewed, then it had to be refilled, and then it is supposed to arrive in the mail. There is nothing I can do to speed up this process... we are in the hands of the VA, and that's how it's done. Anyway, it still hasn't arrived, and his behavior is getting worse.So, I got a call today requesting that I take him out of the facility and into the mental health department at the VA. I'm not even sure where to start with this request. First of all, where is the mental health department? Will they just take a walk-in? And what will happen to him there? Are they supposed to keep him overnight? I am trying to get Dad's psychiatrist on the phone who prescribed all the above medications and get his opinion.I wondered why I was handling all this so well at first, but once I got off the phone after venting to my Mom, I burst into tears. But it didn't last long because I stole a glance over at my 4 month old daughter Emry who was giving me the most sympathetic look... I swear if she could talk, she would have said, "It's okay Mommy."Wait... Just talked to the Doctor while I was writing this and he says that taking him to the Mental Health Department will just result in them giving him a sedative or shot of Xanax and then releasing him -- basically a waste of our time. He also says that the staff just needs to learn to deal with this behavior (which I agree with, but we don't want my Dad to get kicked out). We have the okay to increase his dose of the other two medications until the Xanax arrives. Apparently it was refilled last Thursday, so I don't know why it's taking so long to arrive...
- Jun 29, 12It's that time again! Getting ready for the walk! I have updated the link to the right, and that will bring you directly to our Team Page for the Long Beach Alzheimer's walk where you can join our team, make a general donation, or even donate for a specific walker! I am already recruiting people and I think we're going to have our biggest walking group so far this year!As last year's top Fundraiser for the Walk and as Co-Chair of this year's Alzheimer's Walk, I had the privilege of sharing our story at the Alz Walk Kick Off Party two days ago. I want to share it with my readers. It's a wonderful way to revisit our family's story and our many reasons for walking! So enjoy! :)
(Picture of Me, Blake, and Emry in purple for the Kick off Party)"Tonight is all about energy! I hope we’re all getting excited for the walk this October! It will be here before we know it.I’m reminded every year that with a disease that can make many of us feel so helpless, we can find empowerment in participating in a walk and fund-raising! And that was my motivation last year!This is only my third year walking, and while I’ve had many distant relatives battle with Alzheimer’s, it wasn’t until I became the main caregiver for my Dad, that I became more involved. I never thought that at the age of 26, I would become the decision maker in my Dad’s life, and ultimately his main caregiver outside of his home.So, I started a blog called, “The Upside to Dementia” (which is also my team name). A quick note about myself, I am an actress and singer, so I’m not what you would call shy, and I love to share our story with everyone that I can. I find it very therapeutic mentally and emotionally, and it has also become a useful tool when fundraising. Because people are witnessing the daily struggle of Alzheimer’s through my blog posts, they become more passionate and involved when the Walk rolls around every year. So, I’m happy to say that last year, my team raised $4850. I was blown away by the support of loved ones, as well as the support of others who have their own relatives battling with Alzheimer’s. I’ll will speak more about the fundraising, but first want to tell you a bit about our story….My Dad first showed signs of Dementia when he was 65, and now 7 years later, he is in the advanced stages of the disease. Financially, it has been challenging to keep the level of care that he needs, and we had to move him to a cheaper facility, and from there, he will hopefully be moving into a new Memory Care Facility at the Los Angeles Veterans Association. As many of you know, any change in the daily routine of an Alzheimer’s patient is tough, and these moves deteriorate his condition each time.Fortunately and unfortunately, my Dad is physically very healthy and relatively young, so it seems we will get to witness every terrible stage of this disease.My Dad was at first forgetful, then paranoid, then confused, and then a mixture of all those and more. And I will never forget the day I walked into his mobile home and was almost knocked over by the most foul smell. After searching everywhere, I finally noticed the microwave door was just barely cracked open. Inside, I found a forgotten piece of raw fish sitting in a bowl with flies swarming around it. It had probably been there for a few days. That was when we knew he needed professional help.After a couple months of having a caregiver watch him for a few hours every day, we knew he needed 24 hour care. When we moved him to a board and care, he climbed out the window and ran away in the pouring rain. Luckily we found him pretty quickly since he was the only person walking the streets in the rain. When we moved him to a locked Memory Care facility, he still managed to escape and the police found him a few miles away. He had a gash in his head and I met the ambulance at the hospital where we sat for 5 hours just to get stitches. He has also ran away from his current home after a gate was left open by gardeners, but was found safely by a stranger in front of Vons. I think it’s safe to say, we have an escape artist on our hands!Since moving him to a facility, my weeks have been filled with anxious phone calls, visits, weird behavioral problems, doctor’s appointments and basically just the maintenance of all the necessary aspects of his daily life. I always reiterate to people that Alzheimer’s is so much more than just memory loss.And while I have a lot of responsibility, ultimately at the end of day, I am not a full-time caregiver because he lives in a home. The amount of respect and admiration I have for full-time caregivers is insurmountable.But, like I said before, the financial toll of this disease is probably one of the most stressful parts. Payments for care are estimated to be $200 billion in the United States in 2012. So, we are just one in millions of families dealing with this issue. After July, my Dad’s savings will have run out. He has a $700 gap in what his care costs per month and what his income is every month. (And, he has really affordable care in comparison to most.) I thank God that he was in the Air Force and has qualified for SOME veteran benefits, and I am waiting for the call for when he will be given the okay to be transferred to a new facility run by the Veterans Association. In the meantime, I’m not sure what we’re going to do.So here I am, age 29, married, with a brand new daughter (who, I have to say is probably the youngest volunteer that the Alz Assoc has ever had!), and my Dad cannot enjoy the years of being a Grandpa. He barely noticed my pregnant belly, and most of the time looks right through my daughter as if she isn’t even there. The other day after greeting her with a “What’s up, dude?”, he then called her a “cute little booger”. Any little sentence that comes out of his mouth and actually makes sense is the type of memory I have to cling to. They are funny and sweet, but by no means are the typical memories of a Grandpa spending time with his one and only Granddaughter.When I look at my life, I realize that many aspects of it have evolved from this connection to Alzheimer’s. I am thrilled to be active in the walks and with the Alzheimer’s Association. I have also started an Entertainment Business called The Sassy Songbirds, where we perform for Alzheimer’s patients and seniors in Memory Care, Assisted Living Facilities, and Retirement Communities because I’ve seen first hand how the power of music can raise my Dad’s spirits.So, when I think about our situation and the situation of many of American dealing with Alzheimer’s, I get fired up. I get fired up when I think that5.4 millionAmericans are living with Alzheimer's disease.&One in eightolder Americans has Alzheimer's disease.& most of all:Alzheimer's disease is the sixth-leading cause of deathin the United States and the only cause of death among the top 10 in the United States that cannot be prevented, cured or even slowed.That is scary.So, the name of our Blog may seem strange (“The Upside to Dementia”), but my family has no choice but to find the upside to our situation. My Dad’s sense of humor has remained fairly intact and we have many funny stories of lost shoes, naked episodes, or just crazy moments facilitated by my Dad. Laughter, music, and dance have become a coping mechanism for us, although tears, frustration, guilt, and hopelessness are usually lingering nearby. But, I will tell you the biggest upside (because there are a few when you look at the glass half full): Because of Alzheimer’s, I have more of a relationship with Dad today than I had 10 years ago.So, yes I’m walking for my Dad, but ultimately, I’m walking for everyone who has yet to get the disease. I think of my future. My sister and I used to joke after yet another interesting visit with my Dad, that someday we’ll be the ones sitting in an Alzheimer’s home together driving each other crazy. It’s not really that funny, but it’s quite possibly the truth. It’s too late for my Dad, but what about the next generation and the next one after that?So, my motto, when it comes to fundraising is this:It never hurts to ask.Throw a party, have a raffle, talk to your neighbors, reach out to friends on Facebook…. Get people involved in your story. This disease doesn’t just affect Seniors & Baby Boomers… no one is off-limits. You’ll be surprised to see how many people you know who are affected by this disease!So, let’s get fired up for our loved ones, let’s get fired up to fundraise, and let’s get fired up to Walk to End Alzheimer’s." - Jun 29, 12I feel like someone is playing a mean joke on us. In the past year, Dad has had a broken nose, Scabies, and a Staff Infection... now he has a Hernia. I guess we're just going down the list of all the most annoying reasons to spend time at the doctor's office. His Hernia is intermittent, so it is not always presenting itself, but when it does, my Dad is in pain.Two weeks ago, we spent two straight days in the VA ER trying to assess the problem. The first day, we got seen after 3 hours, but they couldn't find anything wrong with him at that point. The next day, with my baby in tow, we waited 4 hours and I finally gave up. We went home without being seen. We decided to make an appointment for the following week and to just treat Dad's pain with Tylenol in the meantime.His options at this point: Surgery or Live with it. Basically the doctor does not recommend surgery for my Dad (I have to agree that it would be pretty awful for all involved). She wants to fit him for a type of mesh belt that he can wear under his clothes to keep the hernia in. It's pretty clear to me that he will have that off in two seconds flat. I really don't see a good solution to the problem. We have an appointment in a week with General Surgery to see about this 'belt'.Still no word on when he can move into his new home... July is upon us... the last month that he can afford his care at Valley View Gardens. Come August, he will be about $500 short.Picture of "Cowboy" Dad hanging out in the ER...
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