Chris Philpot

Well, well. It's been over a week since I last blogged and, in the absence of Britain's Got Talent, I haven't been watching nearly so much television – certainly nothing that is such communal, appointment-to-view TV. So instead, I'm going to pre-empt a blog I will be writing this week for fifty6, about life after the business card. Except, I'll be making it relevant to anyone a rung or two up the ladder of TV.

To cut a long story short, the point which I'll be making on the company blog is that Google is our 21^st Century Rolodex. We don't need to waste money on 500 limp slips of cardboard (490 of which are out of date before they've even left your desk) when, if we matter enough to someone for them to remember our name, there is a searchable index which should organically list our greatest achievement. This means putting a little work into making the most of sites like LinkedIn and (for TV-philes) The Talent Manager.

The downside is, these services don't tell our whole story.

Standing out in competitive and creative industries such as television and marketing is as much about presentation and flair as it is the raw act of box-ticking. Those bullet pointed lists of qualifications and skills are essential on your CV, but make a pretty flat first impression.

That's where Flavors.me comes in. No, this isn't a sponsored post; I just really like their product. For $20 a year, this is a service that takes all of your social media feeds and collates them into an attractive, easy to design website with zero coding required. Honestly, my Nan could build her own social profile with this service. All of the effort which you have put into maintaining your presence on Facebook, Twitter et al. is suddenly rewarded with an interactive, animated business card. Even as a geek who enjoys the challenge of building his own website, I have kept up my annual subscription to Flavors just because it's a ridiculously cheap way of amalgamating all my social media profiles, into a whole that is greater than the sum of its parts.

Team Flavors with a custom domain name (from £3.35 p.a. through Tsohost, who I can personally recommend) and you have a gorgeous, bespoke website for 16 quid and a handful of coppers, depending on the exchange rate. Oh, and that domain name can link to your Gmail account to turn your email address into you@yourname.co.uk, which will look very professional on the masthead of your CV – and a heck of a lot better than that old chunkylover53@aol.com monstrosity.

In a result that surprised no-one anywhere, shadow dancing act Attraction was declared the winner of Britain's Got Talent 2013. Their patriotic performance, featuring tableaux cameos from Winston Churchill and Her Majesty the Queen, captured the nation's hearts. But the nation's fingers? No, they were busy pressing the rewind button on the Sky+ remote to watch, re-watch and re-re-watch Simon Cowell getting egged by an ensemble violinist. If that's whet your whistle for live TV being forced off script, here are a few previous television studio invasions.

BBC Six O'Clock News (1988)

Forewarned: the above clip contains strong language – not from newsreaders Sue Lawley or Nicholas Witchell, but rather the studio director whose talkback is included in the clip, adding nicely to the sense of chaos. Lawley valiantly carried on as the news studio was invaded by a group of protesters angered by a law against the promotion of homosexuality in schools. They chained themselves to camera cables, ensuring their presence was felt and their voices were heard.

The National Lottery: Jet Set (2006)

Fast-forward eighteen years to just another edition of The National Lottery: Jet Set… or so Eamonn Holmes and Sarah Cawood thought. Two years after Fathers 4 Justice had famously thrown purple paint in The House of Commons and then scaled the walls of Buckingham Palace whilst dressed as Batman, they returned to their part protest, part prank ways by making the case that fathers' rights are not a lottery. Cue two minutes of very awkward filling from Alan ‘Deadly’ Dedicoat. Fortunately, the show ended on time and they were able to cross to the Eurovision Song Contest. Speaking of which…

Eurovision Song Contest 2010

The 55^th annual running of everyone's favourite tolerance-testing telecast was made at least partially more interesting when Spain's entry Daniel Diges was joined onstage by a chap from the crowd adorned with an orange gnome cap. Amusingly, such is the campfest of Eurovision that—in the middle of a group of dancers dressed as mannequins—it took several moments for anyone to realise that he wasn't a part of the performance!

World Snooker Championship 2010

Fathers 4 Justice make their second appearance in this list, taking advantage of links and interviews for the World Snooker Championship being conducted live in Sheffield's beautiful Winter Gardens. 1980s snooker supremo Steve Davis had enjoyed a return to form late in his professional career, and was waxing lyrical with Hazel Irvine about the good old days—until a stampede of protesters forced a hasty throw to VT.

Can you think of any TV studio invasions that I've forgotten? If so, please leave me a comment!

I've remarked before on this blog that there are times when I will post things which are unashamedly geeky… this is one of those times.

I have an addiction. Picture me rising from my swivel chair with a look in eyes that conveys both disappointment and acceptance, as I confess: “Hi, my name is Chris, and I am a mugaholic.” My collection of crackpot crockery extends to some 23 mugs within a couple of metres of where I am sitting, plus a couple of teapots and even a ceramic chicken. That's just one room. But at work, it's a different story. I recently realised that, despite clocking up my first full month as an employee at fifty6, I was still drinking from the same plain Jane white mug I'd been borrowing since my interview.

Not any more!

Like a kid on Christmas morning, this evening I ripped off the bubble wrap from a brand new mug, personalised especially for me. Some months ago, I tweeted about the excellent range of customisable retro computer mugs available at ProMUGS. The designs include staples from the 1980s dawn of the microcomputing age, including the Commodore 64, ZX Spectrum, and Acorn Electron. (Presumably if you buy that last one it takes forever to arrive, by which time you've bought a different mug and don't want it any more. Ho ho ho.)

Anyway, I bookmarked the link to ProMUGS for when I had an occasion worthy of such an addition to my collection. My first pay cheque from fifty6 seemed like a good enough excuse to geek out, so I bought this awesome BBC Micro mug that brings back memories of buggering about on one with my Dad as a very wee nipper, long after it had passed its sell-by-date:

I'm absolutely delighted with it, and in particular am very impressed with the quality of the printing and the weight of the mug. It feels great in the hand. The only problem—and the reason why I have so many mugs—is that it's so clean and shiny, I can barely stand to fill it with tea!

I hope you've enjoyed my recent blog posts on this website – it's been very enjoyable to get back into writing on a regular basis. But as well as writing about telly on this site, did you know I also contribute posts about website management and online marketing to the fifty6 company blog? Here are a handful of my recent posts, one of which went online just this morning:

• How To Adapt Your Business' Logo for Social Media
  In 1986, Huey Lewis and the News proclaimed, “It’s hip to be square”. Clearly the bods behind the internet’s biggest social networks agreed, because from Facebook to Twitter to Pinterest we are all represented by an image confined to a small square box. So how do you make your company’s logo look its best within square confines?

• Why Is Every Website Blue?
  From clear oceans to summer skies via Elvis’ suede shoes, planet Earth is a very blue place. This is especially true of our corporate world, which calls upon blue’s many calming hues to convey trustworthiness and authority. But the web is less stuffy and more human; a domain where brand personalities can breathe. So why has the internet become the azure-net?

• The Top 5 SEO Mistakes
  On the fifty6 blog, Jason and I regularly give you insider tips from the world of SEO. Today, I’m focussing not on what works but rather what doesn’t: these are the five biggest mistakes you can make in your quest to acquire that fabled first link on the search engine results page.

Later this week on the fifty6 blog, I will be telling you how learning the basics of HTML can save your business money. Back over here, expect plenty more television talk in the days and weeks to come!

The Argentine essayist Jorge Luis Borges once wrote, “I have always imagined that paradise will be a kind of library.” I almost completely concur, except that my vision of heaven is a ginormous tape library. Wall-to-wall and floor to ceiling, it would hold every minute of every programme I have ever watched, from Walking with Dinosaurs to Challenge Anneka. It would be a more extensive and better catalogued version of YouTube, without the adverts and the macroblocking. Some of my best memories working behind the scenes in TV involve unpacking crates containing hundreds of hours of sports matches, and running that one crucial tape across to a time-critical edit.

I hope that someone wealthy shares my unhealthily romanticised image of the humble Beta tape, and bids on the astonishing eBay auction for the entire L!VE TV programming archive. For the uninitiated. L!VE TV was a cable TV channel that ran during the 1990s. The popularity of satellite channels (and the rise and rise of BSkyB) prompted a national newspaper—and a smattering of now-household names—to launch their own channel in an attempt to cash in on cable technology. What started as an innovative experiment soon devolved into a race to the bottom to try and bolster the ratings, via unforgettable programmes that can best be described as ‘stunt broadcasting’. Shows on L!VE TV included:

News Bunny

A newsreader sits behind a desk and… erm, reads the news. In the back of shot, a chap dressed as a rabbit gives his thumbs up or thumbs down to each headline.

Britain's Bounciest Weather

Picture your standard weather forecast. Now replace Michael Fish with a midget on a trampoline. You've got the idea.

Topless Darts

Take a wild guess! Let's just say this is one variant form of darts you're unlikely to see on the oche at the Lakeside.

The whole story is wonderfully told in Chris Horrie and Adam Nathan's 1999 book L¿ve TV!: Telly Brats and Topless Darts (ISBN 0671015745). Sadly it looks to be out of print, but you might be lucky enough to find a second hand copy on Amazon. I digress: up for grabs in the eBay auction are more than 100 boxes of archive material from L!VE TV, as well as IP, format rights, trademarks and so on. At the time of writing, bidding stands at a mere £820, which is peanuts for an Aladdin's cave of irreplaceable video.

It's that time of year again! Just as the evenings begin to draw out and warm up, we choose in our millions to sit indoors and gorge on Britain's Got Talent. And why not? Its reputation as surely the greatest TV talent show of the 21^st Century is as hard-earned as it is well deserved. To have missed the final stages of the show's preceding six series is to have missed the début performances of a number of household names. Unlike the acts from new-age farce The X Factor, many have extended their time in the spotlight long after the passing of “flavour of the month” status.

But for every Susan Boyle and Ashleigh and Pudsey, there are the also-rans (and I use that term in the least disparaging manner possible): likeable, entertaining contestants who made the cut on TV but have returned to their roots off-screen. I've delved through the archives (well, YouTube) to rediscover five examples of Britain's Forgotten Talent.

Damon Scott (Series 1, 2007)

First up is the runner up from the very first series of Britain's Got Talent. Whilst many will remember champion Paul Potts, and his ascent from Carphone Warehouse to the Sydney Opera House, fewer will recall the truly unique variety act that Paul pipped at the post. Damon Scott, a.k.a. ‘The Monkey Man’, used his extraordinary puppeteering skills to manipulate a make-believe monkey called Bubbles in time with music from Michael Jackson.

Craig Harper (Series 2, 2008)

If you opened the dictionary and looked up “likeability”, by rights there ought to be a picture of Craig Harper smiling back at you. In a twist straight out of Stars in Their Eyes, Craig's unusual act combined singing and impressionism – but without resulting in mere karaoke. His audition routine was a take-off of all five members of Boyzone, performing the singing parts of Ronan Keating and the late Stephen Gately, with uncannily nonsensical dance moves for “the three who just stood at the back”.

Paul Burling (Series 4, 2010)

Typical: you wait ages for an impressionist, and then two come along at once. Perhaps because, whilst they add enormously to the variety of the auditions, without the element of surprise impressionists struggle to wow the audience compared to the singers and dancers in the semis. I digress: Harry Hill lookalike Paul Burling had been there, done that, and got the Butlins knobbly knees contest trophy to prove it. Hoping to transition away from holiday camps and towards HRH, Paul's quickfire rundown of characters including Scooby Doo, Popeye, Bugs Bunny and several residents of Springfield received 3,003 yesses.

The Arrangement (Series 4, 2010)

Even BGT mega-fans are likely to have forgotten The Arrangement, a group of sixth form music students who auditioned in 2010. Deliberately dressed for a formal performance in keeping with their classical instruments, they subverted expectations by performing The Black Eyed Peas and Beyonce instead of Beethoven and Brahms. Though frontman Jono Miles' voice received an early buzz from Simon, the performance was a hit with Piers, Amanda and the audience.

Jai McDowall (Series 5, 2011)

Rather controversially, I end my rundown of the forgotten stars of Britain's Got Talent with Jai McDowall, who of course claimed the title in 2011. It was a changeable year for the series as a whole, with only Amanda Holden staying on from the previously established judging panel. Morgan made way for funnyman Michael McIntyre, and Simon's vacant seat was filled by that prat from Knight Rider. With so much different about BGT 2011, perhaps it wasn't surprising to see the contest won by a very safe act: a good looking and amiable Scot who could belt out a tune. Jai's talent would have been equally at home on The X Factor, and following his victory the outcome was very X Factor-esque: releasing an album, and being released from his recording contract.

Nevertheless, Jai remains a fine example of the homegrown talent that Britain's Got Talent unearths each year, come rain or come shine.

So, how have you spent your bank holiday weekend thus far?

In a most unusual twist, British summertime has provided us with fleeting glimpses of sunshine. In honour of this rare spectacle, perhaps you've hopped on the bike or chucked some bangers on the barbecue. Not me. Yesterday, I finally got around to upgrading the content management system that powers this website. Most of the improvements are behind the scenes for my eyes only, but one improvement to the front is the fancy new search feature on the blog. To look through past posts, just type your query into the box to your right (or beneath this post if you are browsing on your mobile).

This coming week will mark my first month working at fifty6, and I feel it's reinvigorated my love affair with websites. In an age of social media giving every man and his dog a presence in cyberspace, there's less excitement to be found from carving out your own little niche. However, being a ‘webmaster’ (ugh) offers a sense of satisfaction which I am quickly regaining.

Speaking of fifty6, this week on the new look company blog I wrote about remembering users who are still haunted by “the ghost of technology past” (read: “crap hardware and slow connections”). In this age of ever-increasing connection speeds, it's just not good enough to tolerate bloat when there are ways to make your website load more quickly and efficiently. So check that out, if you are so inclined!

Oh, and this coming week, I'll be writing about why seemingly every website is blue. Ironic, don't you think?

Finally, and in another moment of harking back to the glory days of the retro internet, I have a website recommendation which would surely grace my links page (if I had one). If you enjoyed my recent post on the BBC Four quiz show Only Connect and wish you could play questions online, there is a Facebook group where ex-contestants (and keen amateurs like muggins 'ere) challenge each other with connections of their own devising. Recent answers have ranged from Spartan kings to reasons why everybody is always pickin' on Bloodhound Gang.

That's all for now – I'm going to enjoy the Monaco Grand Prix, and then make the most of this unseasonably seasonable weather!

It's sixteen years since Katrina and the Waves wowed the continent with ‘Love Shine A Light’, bringing the Eurovision Song Contest to UK shores for the first time in… sixteen years, as it happens. Is this a sign that tonight will be Bonnie's night? Is the raspy Welsh belter destined to restore a wounded nation's faith in a singing competition which, in recent years, has become almost as famous for its tactical block voting (or should that be “Bloc voting”?) as it once was for providing a stage for future superstars like Celine Dion and ABBA?

No. Almost certainly not, despite Bonnie's ballad ‘Believe in Me’ being our most convincing entry since Jade Ewen sang ‘It's My Time’ in 2009.

But hopefully in the absence of pride, Eurovision can at least inspire a chuckle amongst us Brits – especially in the age of the information superhighway. We may no longer be able to roll our collective eyes at the constant French translations of Eurovision yesteryear. We've passed our last chance to cringe at nervous national representatives announcing their country's votes via satellite—and offering the country that scored “cinq points” before the one that scored “quatre points”, and having to start all over again. But on the very. very bright side, social media offers a range of platforms to share all of our Wogan-esque catty remarks.

So with just over an hour to go, I am looking forward to Eurovision immensely. Watch out for Malta, incidentally, which was my pick of the semi-final acts. They won't win, but their jaunty ditty about an IT worker called Jeremy is sure to raise a smile.

It's been another productive week for my brain (and a testing one for my fingers) as I tap out a myriad of blog posts. Alongside ones on the blog you're currently browsing, I've written two more posts for the fifty6 blog, tackling issues surrounding website design, management, and marketing. Here's a roundup of my efforts this week:

• Is Responsive Web Design Right For Your Business?
  This May marks three years since web designer and developer Ethan Marcotte introduced the term “responsive web design”. This is a technique whereby a website automagically changes its layout to make best use of the user’s screen, whether they are viewing on a 27″ widescreen monitor or a 3.5″ smartphone. (Try resizing your browser on ChrisPhilpot.co.uk to see responsive design in action.) But such technological witchcraft doesn’t come cheap. Is it right for your business?

• Will Your Site Be p-p-p-Picked Up By Penguin 2.0?
  If you can forgive me the punning title (I couldn’t resist)… this blog comes in response to a recent video from Matt Cutts, head of web spam at Google, about the next major revisions to the so-called ‘Penguin’ algorithm that controls which results the search behemoth serves its users. It summarises the impact, good and bad, that these changes could have for your business.

Food for thought for website owners everywhere! Are there any questions you'd like me to answer in a future blog post?

As a dedicated followed of fashion, I know the importance of a sharp, well-fitted suit. However, given that a two-piece suit is the ultimate blank canvas when it comes to men's fashion, I'm always disappointed with how difficult it is to project my personality onto my outfit whilst retaining a modicum of respectability. The closest I've managed in the past is a natty floral tie, or a tie-pin embellished with a gold* television camera which sadly went missing after a particularly heady student awards do.

Finally, my prayers have been answered – Firebox now stock a men's suit that says everything you need to know about my interests, ambitions, and natural sense of style:

OK, it's hideous. It's a dry clean only migraine. But of course, I love it. If you fancy treating me (I'm a 40″ chest), or are similarly partial to embarrassing yourself for no good reason, then grab one from the virtual clothes rail. Quick, before all the other daltonism sufferers get there first!

*That's gold coloured, just in case you thought I was secretly rich.

At 8:30pm on Monday the 13^th of May, the seventh series of Only Connect will begin on BBC Four. It's a quiz show where contestants must find the connection between different words, phrases, pictures, or pieces of music. The blog which follows is a tribute to one of the best quiz formats of the 21^st Century. Just for fun, I've interspersed a puzzle in the style of the first round of the programme – four pictures with a single link between them. How quickly can you identify the connection?

A recent article in The Sun proclaimed that Wednesday was the best day of the week for going out on the pull. In 2011, statistics released by the FBI revealed that Americans were most likely to witness a bank robbery on a Friday. And as we all know, Saturday nights are alright for fighting. But for fans of all things quizzical, Monday is the best day of the week – and not just because of the quiz night at Savannah in Haywards Heath. Until a couple of weeks ago, Monday served up lashings of University Challenge, and tomorrow it will see the return of the gloriously tricky Only Connect.

Airing at 8:30pm on BBC Four, opposite the leviathan of Corrie elsewhere in the schedules, Only Connect remains something of a hidden jewel in the BBC's crown. Yet far from detracting from the show, Only Connect revels in catering for a loyal audience of eggheads. It is a quiz which exudes exclusivity from the very first note of its string section theme tune, and is unapologetically clever. Word of mouth (and word of Twitter) has seen it punch well above its weight, with episodes in the sixth series regularly pulling in more than a million viewers. The question is: why?

Each episode of Only Connect features two teams of three contestants, introduced by presenter Victoria Coren via the common link between the three. For instance, the first episode of the seventh series will pit three Oxford graduates who attended Corpus Christi College—the “Corpuscles”—against a trio of feline pet owners—the “Cat Lovers”.

The format of Only Connect straddles four rounds. In the first, the teams take turns choosing from six possible questions, and for each question must identify the connection between four clues. These are usually words or phrases, but one set of picture clues and one set of audio clues are thrown in for good measure. At the start of each question, the team is given forty seconds and one clue to try and work out the link. Solving after one clue is very rare and earns the team five points. If they’re stumped, the teams can ask for another clue to make the connection easier to find. This reduces the question's value, falling to three points for two clues, two points for three clues, and just one point if all four clues are required.

Round two is very similar, except that the teams don't score any points for merely identifying the link between the four clues. Instead, the first three clues form a sequence, and must work out the fourth item in the sequence. To borrow an example from the first ever episode, if the first three clues are “Scott”, “Virgil” and “Alan”, knowing that they are the pilots of Thunderbirds 1, 2 and 3 is of no use if you don't know who piloted Thunderbird 4. (The answer's “Gordon”.)

The third round is called “the connecting wall”, and takes things to a whole new level. Just in case finding one connection was a little too easy, each team now has two-and-a-half minutes to find four connections between a grid of 16 jumbled clues. Even when they work out the connections, they’ll discover that some clues can fit into more than one pile—a wall featuring colours alongside former Prime Ministers could contain the clue “Brown”. Only one combination of clues will completely solve each wall. Brilliantly, you can tackle practice walls on the Only Connect website, and even play the same walls as the contestants in time with the programme.

This round tends to offer some of the programme's funniest moments, particularly with walls that intertwine high and low culture. Connections have ranged from Puccini operas to Pokémon.

Only Connect concludes with “the missing vowels round”, where both teams face off on the buzzer. In stark contrast to the rest of the show, the contestants are told the connections in this round before being asked any questions. They are then shown clues which fit that link, but with all vowels removed and spaces added and subtracted at will. For instance, given the connection “Characters in EastEnders”, a typical clue might be “PH LMTC HLL”. A correct answer (“Phil Mitchell”!) is worth one point, but an incorrect answer both loses one point and throws the question to the opposing team for a possible one point bonus. The consequent rapid changes to the scoreline ensure even a struggling team can snatch victory from the jaws of defeat.

Whilst Only Connect gives the impression of being very complicated, the question at its core is simple – “what is the link?” Furthermore, the connections themselves are usually straightforward, perfectly pitched to make you kick yourself when the answers are revealed.

But a handful of times per episode, even the layman viewer (of which I am one) can work out the connection. As question editor David J. Bodycombe wrote in the Guardian, with many questions “your perception of the possible answer changes as each new clue is revealed”. So if a lucky stab in the dark after the first clue is reinforced by the second, you’ll vociferously shout at the screen (or boast on Twitter). Even if you arrive at the right answer after four clues, when the question is only worth one point, you still find yourself feeling utterly smug. It's a far greater sense of achievement than getting a question right whilst watching Tipping Point, say.

Only Connect recaptures a feeling that I haven't had whilst watching a game show since the glory days of Countdown, when Richard Whiteley and Carol Vorderman entertained 3–4 million viewers every afternoon. It was cult viewing; you felt like a member of an exclusive club. Only Connect certainly isn't as familial as Countdown was – on the contrary, Victoria Coren is a hard-edged hostess, and the show's eschewing of question numbers in favour of hieroglyphics is deliberately elitist. But it's a programme that knows and cherishes its audience, and isn't afraid to serve them. Long may it continue.

Still struggling with the picture question? Or do you think you've solved it? Scroll down for the answer…

That's a Martian from the classic advert for Smash instant mashed potato, plus a hammer, a plaster and a bladder. Add the suffix ‘-ed’ and you get “smashed”, “hammered”, “plastered” and “bladdered” – all of which are slang terms for “drunk”. Well done if you got that one at home.

As I announced in my blog last Friday, I’ve recently started working for the digital marketing company fifty6. They (or rather “we”!) also run a blog, providing commentary on the issues surrounding web design, development and maintenance from an SEO perspective. Stripping away the jargon, that simply means getting as many people to visit your website as possible – and making sure that when they do, they love what they see!

Well, this morning marked my first post to the fifty6 team blog: how to make the most of your meta descriptions – those brief page summaries you see when searching on Google. If you’re feeling geeky, please give it a read and let me know your thoughts. Otherwise, I’ll be back over the weekend writing about TV once more in honour of the return of a televisual hidden gem, and possibly the best game show ever.

It may not have escaped your attention that it's been some time since I last updated this blog. Not that I am one to make excuses, but… erm, the dog ate my blog posts?!

Who am I kidding? I don't even have a dog.

There is a good reason for my lack of timely updates: I have a new job! I am now working for fifty6, a very modern, relaxed and ultimately fun digital marketing company based in my native West Sussex. I'm only a few days in, but am already enjoying both the atmosphere and the new challenges, big and small. (Everything from getting to know our clients to having to brush up on my Mac skills!) With this in mind I'm now focussing most of my time on developing my marketing skills, but will endeavour to keep across goings-on in the world of TV – as if I could ever switch off for long!

On that theme, between writing my most recent blog post and starting at fifty6 I have been involved in another telly project. Having enjoyed jumping in front of the camera on The Common Denominator, I was pleased to get another go at winning big cash on a very well-known game show. It won't air until late 2013 or early 2014, so for now I'll leave you on tenterhooks!

(The only thing I will say in advance is that I was chuffed to finally wear the new purple shirt I bought for The Common Denominator. Being the first series, I had never seen the show before – and, by Sod's law, I managed to buy a shirt the exact same colour as their set!)

So in summary: exciting times ahead, with blue skies overhead. Lots to be happy about this May bank holiday weekend!

Though a sight-seeing staple of any trip through London W12, I have actually only visited BBC Television Centre twice. And frankly, neither occasion was especially fruitful. My first trip to TVC was for my first ever job interview. I vividly remember waiting in reception wearing a wool blend suit, sweaty palms, and somebody else’s legs. After inevitably losing out on my dream first job, I later returned to the iconic building to take part in the quiz show The Common Denominator. A fun day out, for sure, but not exactly profitable considering I lost £1,000 and my dignity in the time it takes to boil an egg.

So beyond laughter and life lessons, I haven’t taken anything away from Television Centre when I’ve turned up in person. But as a viewer of Blue Peter, and Only Fools and Horses, and Fawlty Towers, and Noel’s House Party, and so much more besides… I have taken memories of its output that will endure for a lifetime. I find its closure simply heartbreaking. If you’ll forgive my self-indulgence (it’s my website and I’ll cry if I want to), here are just a couple of TVC moments that I know will stay with me down the years.

Noel or No Noel?

To a degree, the spirit of Noel’s House Party has been recaptured by Ant and Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway on t’other side. It features the sense of organised chaos that defined Edmonds’ 1990s ratings behemoth. However, there is one element of Takeaway which disappoints compared to the House Party, through absolutely no fault of its own. In an age of digital broadcasting and satellite delays, interacting with members of the public on location is stilted. In the halcyon (and analogue) days of Crinkley Bottom, Noel could make a viewer appear live from their living room on NTV, in the time it took to click his fingers.

As soon as the NTV interstitial aired, seven-year-old Chris would pull the ghastliest face he could muster in anticipation of his impending stardom – much to the chagrin of his mother.

“…and here’s a memory I made earlier.”

As a child, Blue Peter was my must-see TV. Aged just six or seven, I remember arguing with my father on a trip to the local branch of FADS. (Remember them?) He wanted me to choose wallpaper for my soon-to-be redecorated bedroom. I was concerned that he had asked me to do so on a day when Blue Peter was on the telly. Our fractious conversation concluded with my father’s words: “Even if we get home in time for Blue Peter, you’re not allowed to watch it!”

But despite occasionally coming between us, Blue Peter was more often an opportunity to bond with my Dad. When one particular edition overran and they were forced to drop an item about how to make your own personalised mouse mat, it was my Dad who encouraged me to write to the Blue Peter production team and ask for a fact sheet. In lieu of such a document, I instead received a far greater form of recompense: the fabled Blue Peter badge. (Sadly I lost it, for a second and final time, on Brighton beach one day in the late noughties.)

One Blue Peter memory could only have happened in the days when the show was broadcast from Television Centre. Presenters Matt Baker and Simon Thomas, dressed in their finest lederhosen, were supposed to open the ceiling-high “elephant” studio doors to welcome a traditional German marching band into TC7. However, the doors were heavier than anticipated. Try as Matt and Simon might, they just couldn’t get them open! Stagehands upon stagehands piled into view to try and force open the unwieldy doors, as Matt and Simon – and me and my father – fell about laughing. When the crew finally prised the doors apart, a backlog of band members haphazardly entered en masse. Only at Television Centre.

And so on the day of the very,very last news output from BBC Television Centre in Wood Lane, London, I pay my respects to its hallowed bricks and mortar. Its days may be numbered, but Television Centre will have a home in this viewer’s heart forever.

It’s now just three days until I am a contestant on new Channel 4 quiz show The Common Denominator. The episode I am on will air this Monday, the 25^th of February at 3:30pm. I’ve got the afternoon free but, if you can’t take a late lunch, make sure to set your Sky+. What’s more, you can even watch on Channel 4 HD for the chance to scrutinise my every imperfection.

All things permitting, I intend to tweet along with the show. If you are interested in hearing a little added commentary, behind the scenes gossip, and general fodder for the internet’s many trolls, make sure to follow @ChrisPhilpot. Finally, if you miss the show completely, it will be available on as Series 1, Episode 6 on 4oD shortly after broadcast.

So the only question remaining is: how did I get on? You don’t have long left to wait to find out!

Update: As well as catching up online, you can now view an interactive image gallery with frame grabs from the show.

(Let’s get this right out of the way: yes, I am blogging about PowerPoint on Valentine’s Day. And no, this is not because of crippling loneliness. When I decided to resume blogging earlier this month, my initial burst of inspiration spawned several article synopses. Amongst these was a post about my love affair with PowerPoint. In my defence, I simply spotted the obvious February day to write it.)

Every now and then, the internet’s flavour of the month (or perhaps “meme of the moment”) is not a Korean man dancing or a flying Pop-Tart pussycat. Instead we netizens collectively guffaw at dubious Photoshop work, such as promotional literature and magazine adverts suffering from mutilated faces, misplaced limbs, and hands where hands should not be.

Unsurprisingly, comments on such images often tease the artists responsible for their creation. You don’t find many people blaming the image-editing software that was used whilst remarking, “Wow, Adobe really dropped the ball on this one!” Yet when we endure a dull presentation, we tend to judge not the speaker, but rather their slideshow program. Invariably this is Microsoft PowerPoint, a software package with a seriously crummy reputation – one which it does not deserve at all.

Most PowerPoint presentations are raw and unrefined.

Take a typical nervous public speaker, tasked with creating a killer presentation. My metaphorical speaker starts by populating a PowerPoint, and it makes sense to break their topic into subheadings and give each its own slide. These become individual notes pages, filled with detailed longhand prose. Now this should be the perfect basis for their presentation’s script; just simplify the copy and paste it into the slide notes, and leave key points on the slides themselves. But no. Instead, this single bullet point and its associated wall of text is read out verbatim, word by painstaking word. (Award bonus points if the font size is 10pt or less, and/or the text is black on navy blue for minimum contrast.)

This is by far the most common PowerPoint problem that I see. The solution is to put yourself in an audience member’s shoes (preferably the individual furthest from the screen) and then practice, practice, practice. Even if the example above had featured a superb slideshow, it wouldn’t make up for a poor speaker – though it could of course help them out.

Showing all of that text on screen at once takes the speaker’s eyeline away from the audience. This immediately reduces engagement, whilst also encouraging the audience to read ahead and lose interest in ideas raised orally. Alternatively, displaying short bullet points one-by-one as the script reaches the relevant place would instantly return focus to the live speaker. This technique ensures a logical, flowing presentation – and once these basics are mastered, that PowerPoint can be pretty as a picture, too.

PowerPoint is simple yet feature-rich – and nowadays, it looks great.

Whilst working for a corporate events company in Brighton, I was supplied with a presentation to be shown on a super-sized screen at an awards ceremony and tasked with refining it and adding a little pizzazz. I quickly realised that although the presentation was sizable with over 100 different slides, its structure was largely cyclic. Each category had one slide showing the award title, and another to introduce the award giver, then a slide for each nominee, and finally one with a photo of the winner.

By breaking the presentation down into its core elements, I was able to assign each type of slide a 3D transition which instantly raised its impact. We can be fearful of animation within presentations, and it is tempting to make effects very fast to alleviate the pain! This whizz-bang approach often renders a slideshow distracting. In the context of the awards event, each slide was accompanied by at least 30 seconds of live speech – my three second transitions might’ve ambled in a board meeting but here they had time to breathe. Being 3D, they added significantly to the television-esque ceremonial spectacle.

My tip when building a visually impressive presentation is really get to know your slideshow. Do animations start automatically, or are they triggered by user interaction? Does one animation finishing prompt another to begin? If you’re saving the slideshow to your USB drive or Dropbox to show remotely, is the hardware you’ll be using on the day capable of rendering animations smoothly? (Worse still, are you designing for PowerPoint 2013 when on site you’ll be using PowerPoint 2003?)

Perhaps the most important question of all is: do the animations or effects in your PowerPoint strengthen the points you are making, rather than distracting from them? If not, simplify.

Who said you can only create slideshows? Make games or even movies!

I honed my PowerPoint skills back in secondary school on numerous class projects. One in particular that sticks in my mind was in Year 10 Science with Mrs Rimmer. Keen to get us revising for our GCSEs despite the inherit tedium associated with such activities, we were tasked with creating board games based around questions from the curriculum. Being a game show geek I took this a step further and used PowerPoint to design a selection of bonus rounds from Catchphrase – remember the grid of squares with a puzzle hidden beneath? – with scientific solutions.

Sadly, I can’t find a copy of that presentation (the computer it would have been made on is long gone) but a rummage through the virtual vault unearthed a contemporaneous Deal or No Deal game that entertained my long-time friend and occasional collaborator Luke from Lightwind Productions.

Meanwhile, YouTube user Blastoons was a finalist in the video site’s ‘Project:Direct’ competition back in 2009 with the short film ‘Joiners’. This four-and-a-half minute animated love story was one of the more unusual entrants, as it was produced entirely within PowerPoint.

OK, so obviously your next board meeting or academic presentation won’t benefit from a gold lame jacket and a musical interlude, but this does show the true scope of an oft maligned software package. You could certainly employ the techniques in those examples to add emphasis to key facts or data.

In conclusion, Microsoft PowerPoint is perhaps not quite as quick to master as its brethren within the Microsoft Office family. Once you do get the swing of it you’ll find limitations, annoyances and quirks – for the market leading software, it’s not as all-encompassing as the big guns from the worlds of image and video editing. But it strikes a happy medium, and some of PowerPoint’s idiosyncrasies are merely a motivation to think outside the box to achieve your presentational goals.

That’s why I love PowerPoint. Plus, at this time of year, it’s a very cheap date!

If you’d like me to help you make the most of Microsoft PowerPoint, please get in touch.

This time last week I relaunched my website – and for what it’s worth, I’m really pleased with the reaction it’s garnered so far. But I didn’t twig that last Sunday, the 3^rd of February, marked another important date in my life: the ninth anniversary of my appearance on Countdown.  Now I’ve already milked that tale ‘til the cow ran dry, but suffice to say it was an enlightening experience which undoubtedly motivated me to work towards a career in TV.

Fast forward to last November. During a routine trawl of my Facebook wall, I spotted a message on the Deal or No Deal page asking for applicants for a new Endemol quiz show. It was called The Common Denominator, but had nothing to do with maths – contestants would be tasked with finding the common theme between two seemingly unrelated clues. For example, Harry Judd and Back to the Future are linked by “McFly”, and Istanbul and Christmas have “Turkey” in common.

Fancy a go? Look at the photos below – what is the common denominator between the first image and the second? It’s a one word answer, which you’ll find at the bottom of this post.

Following an only slightly embarrassing audition where I may have uttered the word “innit”, I was chuffed to be picked to take part in the series. And so it came to pass that, a couple of weeks later, I stepped into Studio 6 at Television Centre and broke my eight-and-a-bit year duck in front of the camera. There’s a lot that I can’t say about the experience until after the show airs, mainly because I don’t want to spoil the outcome, but I certainly did discover a lot about being on the box.

High definition make-up is amazing!

When I was on Countdown, a dusting of foundation was all it took to stop my skin from shining under the lights. But now that television has gone HD, that no longer cuts the mustard as you can see any imperfections or clumps in the powder. Accordingly I was privileged to witness art meeting science: the MUA blended liquid foundation to match my skin tone (or at least to as light a shade as she dared to go) before airbrushing directly onto my less-than-chiselled features. My fizzog was so sculpted, and yet uniformly pale, that I couldn’t help but feel like Edward Cullen from Twilight.

Being on telly is tremendous fun…

Being able to look clever (sometimes) and lark about (throughout), all in the knowledge that hundreds of thousands of people are going to watch you doing so, is truly intoxicating. Though I’m not a jealous person, I can’t help but envy the cast of TOWIE given that they enjoy that feeling on a daily basis despite bearing no discernible talent whatsoever.

…because of the brilliant people around you.

Something I've found behind the scenes in TV absolutely carries through to being on screen: making telly is loads of fun because of the people you get to meet. My opponent on Countdown, writer Ariane Sherine, was friendly and funny – and I was just as lucky on this new programme. My adversaries were a warm and avuncular gent called Tony, and a lady called Laura who I could best describe as delightfully nutty! (Her stories in the green room were side-splittingly unbroadcastable.) Being with the two of them was like being a member of an improvisational comedy troupe. With the production team also going out of their way to put everyone at ease, I thoroughly enjoyed my time with a marvellous group of people.

That’s roughly all I can say for now. I don’t know the date when the episode I’m on will air, but game show commentary uber-site Bother’s Bar informs me that the series starts on the 18^th of February at 3:30pm on Channel 4. So there’s probably not too long to wait now – I’ll keep you posted.

Just one final thought: in a perverse way I am particularly looking forward to the impact of Twitter on the overall experience of appearing on the small screen. My Countdown episode was broadcast before the advent of social media, so whilst viewers may well have thought I was a twit (original word redacted) they couldn’t let me know about it!

(Answer to the picture puzzle: the common denominator between a pregnant belly and Tony Blair is “Labour” – as in giving birth, and the political party. Well done if you solved it – mainly because I made it up and it's not very good! Perhaps you should apply for the next series.)

Update: The production team have been in touch and the episode I'm on airs on Monday the 25^th of February at 3:30pm. I am looking forward to it immensely!

When I started running on location shoots and OBs, I felt like I was getting somewhere the first time I saw a large, broadcast camera… and didn’t register excitement. “Sure,” I reflected, “it’s the best part of a hundred grand’s worth of kit, and its pictures are watched by millions of people, but ultimately it’s just a part of the job.”

However, I am still delighted upon receiving a call sheet, hot off the PDF presses and brimming with itineraries and logistics. It brings out my inner 8-year-old cub scout and his love of being prepared. Sadly you don’t always get the chance to plan ahead, as I found out last year when an eleventh hour shout-out for a runner caught my eye. My weekend was looking rather sparse, so I was pleased to step up to the plate—but my neglected rucksack was less ready. It was awkward, bulky, and poorly stocked. I resolved not to let myself be caught out again; on the contrary, I wanted the ultimate location bag, small enough to stow away but chock full of useful items.

There are already a handful of articles online with advice on stuffing a backpack. I originally sought inspiration from Lifehacker’s killer ‘go bag’, plus Jude Winstanley’s ever-brilliant The Unit List (bookmark it!) has a detailed crib sheet for TV runners. But the former is too tech-oriented, and in my view there are items that can be added to the latter – plus a few things they suggest that I’ve not yet needed, though of course your mileage may vary.

So the following is a list of what I actually take on location:

Rucksack: Karrimor Sierra 10

My biggest grumble with the rucksack I’d used previously was its sheer size, so I went from one extreme to the other – imagine swapping a 17″ MacBook Pro for an 11″ MacBook Air. Whilst inherently more portable, the small size is not without its limitations and with hindsight Karrimor’s Taurus 20 would probably have made it easier to carry A4 documents. Nonetheless, in terms of sheer ‘stuffability’ the Sierra 10 is a veritable TARDIS. I have even used it as an overnight bag and managed to cram in a fresh set of clothes!

Stationery: plastic-covered notebook, plastic A4 folio with Velcro straps, clear popper wallet, pencil case with various rollerballs, Sharpie

I must confess that I am obsessive about stationery, but here everything serves a purpose. A hardback notebook is easier to scribble in on the go, and a plastic folio helps paperwork to keep its shape and offers extra protection from the elements. A clear wallet provides a convenient cubby for receipts and petty cash, and its a lot more secure than an open pocket. Finally, a range of rollerball pens and a permanent marker will cover every circumstance from logging timecodes to writing names on cellophane packets.

Oh, and one quick word of advice: be careful if you take Blu-Tack. When the contents of your backpack shuffle around it makes everything it touches feel greasy, as I learnt the hard way!

Cleaning: Flash disposable wipes, J Cloth, disposable gloves

When I was a runner for the World Darts coverage, I absolutely swore by Flash wipes. They’re handy, cleanse surfaces in seconds, and one or two wipes is enough for an entire kitchen area. On the shoot which inspired this post, I had to run for a pack after a camera op accidentally plonked his very-expensive camera down in a puddle of wee. (Brighton on a Saturday morning for you!) Funnily enough, on a subsequent project after I’d stocked up my bag I travelled home on the train and a chap nearby dropped his beer (and it clearly wasn’t his first). His perplexed expression upon my presenting him with a J Cloth was priceless!

Technology: spare mobile phone, USB drive, iPod/iPhone lead

“Got an old mobile?” asks the trendy young man on the Envirofone advert. Well I’ve just had a look and my old phone is worth precisely… nothing. If you’re in the same boat, that phone could be a useful back-up if your smartphone dies when you’re out and about. All you need is a spare SIM – you may even have been forced to put £10 onto one you didn’t need when you bought a new phone. Just remember that your network is at liberty to disable “unused” SIMs, so if you want to store your phone switched off to conserve battery life take it out every few weeks and send a quick text.

Having a spare charger for your phone in your bag will also prove useful (or even just make you look resourceful when a colleague’s phone runs out of juice). Finally, USB drives are dirt cheap and basic commodities in the information age. Fellow geeks may like to investigate installing some portable apps for use on the go.

Medicine: paracetamol, ibuprofen,  anti-bacterial hand gel, sticking plasters, tissues

When you’re working there is little worse than enduring a headache. By having the basics on your person, you’re less likely to be caught off guard. Ditto with a travel-sized bottle of hand gel and plasters in a range of sizes – save yourself the embarrassment of having to find the first aid kit for a nick on your thumb! I store everything here together in a clear, resealable plastic case. That way they’re easy to spot when my eyes are hurting, and simple to grab even if I’ve chopped off a digit!

Life savers: Polos, Softmints, Trebor Extra Strong, etc.!

It’s important to eat well on location to keep your energy levels up, but flavoursome foods can leave a nasty taste in the mouth – especially for everyone working near you! Simply place a packet of Polos in your rucksack and your reputation will stay in mint condition. (Sorry.)

…and finally: a poncho!

OK, it hasn’t yet proven a lifesaver, but I picked up two for £1 and I’m sure one day that will prove money well spent! All joking aside British weather can be wildly unpredictable, so accompanying my more frivolous waterproof is a sturdy collapsible umbrella, plus a torch for when the nights set in.

So what don’t I carry? Most notably, a multi-tool – just a personal choice, as I don’t feel safe carrying anything that might be perceived as a weapon. I would happily take an “airline safe” model if such a thing existed. I also don’t take gaffer or hazard tape – quality ones are very expensive (more than the cost of my rucksack!) and you’ll usually find a suitable roll is already available on the production.

I’ve bought everything above bit-by-bit, but estimate the overall cost to be around £40. Not an awful lot to feel confident at work.

Do you reckon I’m missing something? Or what item above would you leave behind? Post your thoughts in the comments.

A couple of weeks ago, on my annual trip to work on the World Darts Championship, I popped over to my alma mater to say hello to some of the ‘old guard’. This three mile wander brought back memories by the dozen, and reminded me that it’s been almost two years since I graduated. The same length of time had passed since I’d last redesigned my website, its content and style steadfastly stuck in 2011.

Until today!

I’m pleased to say farewell to the old site’s single-page layout (reasonably innovative but utterly restrictive) and instead to welcome you to an online presence that’s received a significant refresh. More pictures, a top-to-bottom rewrite, my revamped CV, and this blog which I will be using as an outlet for my thoughts on all things related to TV and the web. On a technical level, this website is now fully responsive, automatically adapting its layout to best fit your screen size. Mobile users rejoice!

Fellow geeky types may like to know more about the technologies upon which this site is based:

• Pulse CMS: I’ve taken the plunge into a content-managed website, editable anywhere via a web browser rather than just in my text editor of choice. I chose Pulse because it doesn’t make a significant impact on the design process. Just build your webpage in the usual way, and then wherever you want to include text or images add a ’block’ – a chunk of code editable through the Pulse interface which you can fill with content and change on the fly.

• Kube by Imperavi: a CSS framework which, unlike so many others that I’ve tried, hasn’t made development a chore. Quite the contrary, in fact – laying out even complex pages such as my aforementioned CV has been straightforward and even enjoyable. Furthermore, the responsive design add-on made it a doddle to tweak the site for mobiles.

• Sycha’s Smooth Scrolling: My old site also featured jQuery based scrolling to internal anchor links, but this lightweight script was about 100 times easier to implement. Recommended!

That’s pretty much it for my first post. Sorry it’s not been more exciting, but I feel like a runner just relieved to have crossed the finish line! Over the coming weeks I plan to write a number of posts based on my experiences and discoveries from my work as a runner and logger in TV…and at least one tribute to my love of Microsoft PowerPoint. You have been warned!